Posted by: shrunk | 2009/02/26

Counselling - is it necessary

Hi Cybershrink

I' ve been to 4 sessions with a counselling psychologist to iron out small things in my 4-month-old marriage and because I have slight depression and low self-esteem. The sessions sometimes tend to turn into a chat and the psychologist actually started nodding off in the session last week! She was also probing into a dream I had that I think was of little significance, and continually trying to dig for issues that I think don' t exist! I phoned to cancel this week and of course was told it' s " bad to stop now" . There' s nothing really " wrong"  with me, I' m not desperately unhappy etc, so why can' t I hold the counselling for now? It seems a waste of time...

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Dear pre-shrink,
There are various varieties of counselling, The more it is based on old-fashioned and discredited Psycho-abalytic stuff, the more useless it is. And probing into dreams is uually a sheer sign of unscientific old-fashioned waffle.
This is why you'll notice I at present promote only CBT ( COgnitive-Behaviour Therapy ) becasue there is a lot of good quality research showing that it does work and does have lasting benefits. The only worse sign that whatever counselling you're having isn't getting anywhere, than the therapist nodding off to sleep, is if you fell asleep during the session. It must be more tan a conversation, must have identified aims and goals, and a logical way to get there from here. She shouldnt need to dig for issues, as the releant issues should be ovious to both of you, and when they're settled, the therapy is done. If she says" It's bad to stop now" --- ask "Specifically how, and why ? "
All counselling cerainly isn't equal, and this one sounds pointless. It does sound like a waste of time. And should you need help in the future, go for CBT

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Our users say:
Posted by: Maria | 2009/02/26

Counselling might not be a waste of time, but this counsellor certainly seems to be. I would find someone else if I was you. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy works well and it might be a good idea to sort out the slight depression and self-esteem problems while they' re still small, rather than wait until it becomes big issues. Remember not all counsellors are equal.

Reply to Maria

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