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Question
Posted by: Liberated mom | 2004/11/03

condoms

I am a single parent, raised my son alone since he was about 4. He is 15yrs old now. We have recently discussed sex (the whole ten yards, everything from the good part of it to pragnancy and std's), and he asked if I would get him some condoms, which I did.

He apparently told his buddies about this, because one of the mothers phoned me this morning. She was very insulting, calling me and my son names, and accused me of setting a bad example for her own and others children.

Was what I did so wrong?? I actually thought I did the right thing, but after that unpleasant conversation I have serious doubts.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageTeen expert

Dear Liberated Mom,

you have not done anything wrong and you have also done what you can to ensure your son does not make someone pregnant by accident, and that he does not contract any STI's or HIV.

The mother who phoned you sounds like one of the people who buries their head in the sand, doesn't want to admit that their child is becoming a sexual being, or holds the ignorant view that if you don't talk about something then it won't happen.

This mother may have to think again if her son makes someone pregnant or he contracts an STI. So you talking to your son has also done a favour to his friends.

What you have done is responsible parenting, well done. A phrase that was used here to advertise AIDS awareness was love your child enough to talk about sex. You have done this and don't let conservative, narrow-minded people make you change your instincts as a mother.

Best wishes

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Our users say:
Posted by: bender | 2004/11/05

CONGRATULATIONS! I must take my hat off to you for being so brave to share the joys of life with your son. One day, when he is HIV- and hasn't gotten a girl pregnant, and all the other horror stories, he will sit you down and thank you for being the good and responsible parent that you are.

I hope he doesn't think this gives him a licence to thrill, but will make him at least think twice before just jumping into bed with anyone.

Mom's like you should be saluted, not put down by mothers who pretend that the world is a perfect place. The meer fact that the other boys mom phoned you, means that he himself wanted his mom to talk to him, otherwise he would never have braught the subject up with his mom!

TWO BIG THUMBS UP TO YOU!!!!!

Reply to bender
Posted by: Soslo | 2004/11/04

I totally agree with you on that decision because as much as parents want to deny that their children are having sex it is a sad reality because they are .thumbs up to being a well informed and concerned parent and thumbs down to the ignorant

Reply to Soslo
Posted by: Zee | 2004/11/03

U did a right thing, dont feel bad about it. That woman who called you is out of her mind, and he is putting her children at risk of "making girls pregnant' or HIV. Kids start to be sexually active at young age and they will never let u know when they start. I believe that as Parents its our responsibility to educate our children about "sex". She is crazy and probably has a guilty concious coz she is not doing her part as a parent

Reply to Zee

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