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Question
Posted by: IS IT ME? | 2004/09/22

Communication in marriage

My husband and I need serious help. I feel he critizes EVERYTHING I do and that he never listens to me. I have to explain everything I say before he "understands". He says I can't communicate properly. He doesn't understand me and oviously vice versa. We obviously can't resolve these issues by ourselves, we talk about it and everythings fine for a while and then the same issues pop up again.

Were do we go?

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Our expert says:
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Communication is like TV. You need good programme content. You need a good broadcaster / transmitter, and you need a good receiver and TV set. Sounds like your content is fine, and you transmit --- but that his receiver is faulty. Marriage counselling can and should help --- maybe contact FAMSA.
SOme men complain that after marriage, their wives who used to go to so much trouble to look good, "let themselves go" and don't bother or try so hard --- and I think many husbands, who used to take the trouble to listen and understand what was being said to them, also "let themselves go" and don't try at all.

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Our users say:
Posted by: IS IT ME? | 2004/09/22

Thank you Inc! It seems as soon as you sign that piece of paper they think "now I can let go" or I don't know what they think. Do they think at all??? Before we got married we had the perfect relationship, we had no communication issues then. What happens? Why all of a sudden I'm the bad guy, the wicked witch that can't do anything right?

I've made an appointment for us to go to counselling. I'm sure that will help though. Wish us luck.

Reply to IS IT ME?
Posted by: Inc | 2004/09/22

It seems there is some kind of flaw in the gold used for wedding rings... seems like once the ring in placed on the finger, then the communications become faulty.
Either your husband has selective hearing or you are cleary speaking through your bum... what is wrong with men when you marry them? It's like they suddenly think they are in creche again!

Reply to Inc
Posted by: Keny | 2004/09/22

Sorry to criticize but if you cannot communicate with each other properly then why did you get married.

Reply to Keny
Posted by: Shaun | 2004/09/22

My suggestion, seek marriage counselling. The sooner the better.
Good to hear that you realise you need the assistance/guidance to work through your concerns.

Good luck,
Shaun

Reply to Shaun

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