Posted by: Lucy | 2008/11/28


Realising I have a drinking problem, I booked myself into rehab for 3 weeks, and I' ve just come out. When I left they told me that I' m extremely Co-dependant &  should get councilling, as it may be an obstacle to my recovery. It' s the first time I' d heard the term, so read a few brief articles on it, and couldn' t see much of myself in the " control"  part. My partner of 17 years died 3 years ago (he was an alcoholic &  could be pretty abusive). Since then I' ve kept to myself and avoided any relationships. Seeing that I' m not in any relationship, so have no-one to be co-dependant about, I' m confused as to how co-dependancy could be an obstacle?
Hope you can advise. Thanks

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Our expert says:
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Its a pity they didnt explain more fully what they meant, as this does indeed sound an odd use of nthe term. They may have been suggesting that you were co-dependent with your alcoholic partner, but as you say, if you're in no curent major relationship, its hardly useful to describe you as co-dependent to yourself.
Anyway, I believe that though the short stints in rehab can be a useful beginning, they're never enough for anyone with a significant drinking problem, and personal counselling, preferably of a realistic CBT ( Cognitive-Behaviour Therapy ) format, should be routine. Congratulations on your good sense in recogn izing the problem that was developing, and on starting to regain control of it

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