Our expert says:
That must have been a terrible shock and insult for you. That he was unfaithful to you is bad enough, but actually fathering a child with someone else when he knew it would be especially hurtful to you ... that's awful.
Having children is important to many of us, but it isn't the only important aspect of marriage, and can't be allowed to take precedence over loving care for each other.
If he is genuinely concerned to try and keep the marriage together, then he should join you in marriage counselign to work on all these issues.
Presumably he is supporting only the one child which is his, from this other woman ? That's a sore point for you, but maybe we'd think much less of him if he didn't. But other than in respect to the child's needs, he need have no more contact with the woman.
It should be possible to heal this sad mess, for the benefit of you both
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