Our expert says:
The trouble is, you cannot make binding intellectual agreements or promises about emotional matters. With the best intentions, you can't prevent yourself from becoming emotionally attached. And his jealousy reveals how he feels, unreasonably --- such feelings are not about reason. From your descripion of how badly he treated you, this is a relationship you are probably well rid of. In regard to your prior divorce, you probably had longer to come to terms with the end of that relationship, and this time it happened more suddenly. Maybe a counsellor could help you get this all into perspective more efficiently ?
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