Our expert says:
If I understand you, when you started going with him, and even chose to have a child with him, you knew about the ex gf and his child with her. If so, you don't really have a right to become upset about it now. And if he keeps contact with the child ( and, necessarily, then, with the ex ) that shows rather better behaviour on his side - you surely wouldn;t expect him to abandon the child ?
Now, him having affairs with other women suggests this is a guy with little real respect for women or for his relationships with them, and you need to understand that he isn't likely to change.
Throwing boiling water over him and burning him is a serious asault, and way out of proportion to what he did which bothered you. Why would you expect him to forgive and forget such a painful assault ?
Why do you persist in wanting to continue a relaionship with him ? And why would any lady want to "check up on him" ? But you talk about wanting to end your relationship with him, which suggests in some way you think it isn't broken off yet - yet you talk about happily going with other men.
Are you complaining that he tries to keep contact with his child by you ? How does he "force" you to let him buy groceries - and is it really an awful thing if he buys you things he sees you and the child do not have, even though he can't be earning much ?
You don't trust him ( understandably ) and don't want him to touch anything - he you still "love" him. What is it you love about him ? You don't mention anything you find loveable.
You dont want him to come round, and yet get worried if he doesn't come round ?
Maybe you should see a counsellor to work out what you actually want, and how to get there from here, as at present this all sounds very confused.
As I said years ago, if you don't decide where you're going, you will probably end up somewhere else
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