Posted by: lee | 2008/07/04

cancer shock - evil stepmom

Good day,

My farther (66) has been diagnosed with cancer (not sure what the origin is, but it is in his throat and lungs). There is nothing that can be done and he has a couple of months left.

My mother died 14yrs ago and my farther remarried. A horrible woman - believe me we (my brother and sister) have tried everything with her, but she is a very unstable person. She has kept him away from us (he is also to blame, I know) for the past 14 years and we only saw him about 3 or 4 times a year. She alienated us from him and even now after this news she is horrible to us and tries to keep us away from him. She is extremely rude to us when we phone and when we visit him now. Obviously we want to spend time with him and his grandchildren wants to as well, what is even worse is that she does it in front of him and it upsets him tremendously.

What can we do?? How do we deal with this? I have contacted a counselor at cansa for counseling with regards to the cancer and how to deal with it, but how do we deal with her now?

Thank you.

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Our expert says:
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Depending on your father's direct and physical needs, yes indeed, as Tango suggests, suggest to him the local hospice, which can help with care at home and in the hospice at times, depending on his needs, and can help the family as well. Concentrate on your relationship with your father, refusing any invitations to conflict which may come from the stepmother

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: lee | 2008/07/04

Thank you for the advice, but she and my dad are refusing counseling.

Reply to lee
Posted by: Tango | 2008/07/04

So sorry about this family estrangement at this time - please please contact your local Hospice. There is a specially trained multi disciplinary team there to help your father and all of you to cope at this time.

Reply to Tango

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