Our expert says:
Amnesia is not required.
But it doesn't sound as though the counselling is completed, and I'm not sure what you mean by "forgiven" - you feel unable to trust him and have given up the idea of marriage. Forgetting is not the aim in the sense of amnesia and forgetting anything ever happened - but resolving the issues of what you each feel comfortable expecting from each other, and what sort of shared view of the future you may have, is the purpose of it.
That it happened will never change - if you still feel convinced that this means it may happen again at any time, the relationship will not work. if you feel he has changed and is no more likely to cheat than anyone else, then it can work - but only if you are now both capable of living in the present and future, rather than in the past.
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