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Question
Posted by: Anon | 2020/06/10

Boring sex

We have been married for 30 years, and there was a time where our sex life was exciting, we had some toys, we used to 69 and touch each other, but for years now, sex is me on top, her on top, she has a few orgasms, she rolls over and I finish. She never touches me, the only oral sex is me going down on her, I am not even allowed to finger her anymore. We are in our 50s, but my libido is still high, I love foreplay more than the sex itself, sex used to be massages, I would watch her masturbate or use a vibrator, this was so exciting, but now I find myself not that interested anymore. I recently bought a vibrator to try spice things up a.bit, but there was no sex at all until I got rid of it. She wont touch me, she wont do different styles anymore, she says we are older now, and she doesn't like those things. I booked her for an erotic massage, that I was hoping would get her going, even if it was another man, but she wouldn't go through with it, we got there and she backed out. I do not know what to do anymore, how can I revive our exciting sex life. I guess I must mention that years ago, I did give a friend of mine a BJ, and when I told her she was real angry, and that was the huge change in our sex life, it was my fault for experimenting without her consent, but its over 15 years now, and I cant seem to make it right, she said then that she would never give me a BJ again, which I accepted and understood, but our while sex life is just boring, she says its fine and frequent and I juts want more and more, but I just want to meet in the middle somewhere. Any advise

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSex expert
- 2020/06/17

https://drdespina.podbean.com/ Listen to the first two podcasts. 


The transgression of the BJ needs to be worked through. How much have you discussed this incidence? Because without really processing this and getting your wife's forgiveness, you will struggle to regain the sex life you desire. 

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