Posted by: Kendra | 2008/06/13

Black & White Men

Black guys just have that cool attitude about them. They give me the impression that nothing's too hard to overcome whether in the workplace or at home. They enjoy life. The way they walk, the way they dress. It's just their whole mannerism that sets them apart from their white counterparts. I'm busy looking at a white guy and a black guy sitting alongside each other in my department and the black guy is tapping his feet to some imaginery music and he looks so in control. The white guy looks stressed with his hand over his mouth. Oh well, it takes all kinds to make a world I suppose.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I'm with GVOR in my aversion to boxes. Cool is not skin deep, nor revealed by surface behaviour. Isn't there hope in Visitor's story ? Not that the child has a Politically Correct answer, but that she does understand the question

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Our users say:
Posted by: Carol | 2008/06/13

Maybe the black guy has a lot less to be stressed about as the white guy is looking for all the answers ---- just kidding!!! Maybe different people deal with stresses in their lives in different ways - the black guy could've shut himself off from the world (daydreaming about his problems) and the white guy shows the world that he is stressed! Not all people show their true feelings -- they can appear to be happy-go-lucky, yet they have something that they are not showing the world!

My child has a lot of friends at school and I can count the white friends on one hand - he has many black and coloured friends and I must be honest, they are much better behaved than their white classmates!!! For eg. took 20 of them to Spur for b-day lunch - the one white kid squirted tomato sauce all over his pizza 'cos he did not want to eat it - then jumped up and down on seat and sent cola all over the table. The little black guys sat at looked at this hooligan as tho they had never seen anything like it before!! I was totally embarrassed by this brat's behaviour! The black kids thanked us before they left, the white kid pitched up without RSVP to the invitation and then left without saying thank you or even greeting us - takes all kinds to make this world!

I was born and raised in the "apartheid" era - I hated what it did to my country then and I hate what it is doing to my country now! We should learn to live together in peace and accept people for who and what they are - no matter what colour their skin is! I work with a lot of black people and I must admit, they are ALWAYS laughing and chatting and seem to get on so well, the white girls are a bunch of byotches who never have a nice thing to say about others! By the way, I am a white woman!

Reply to Carol
Posted by: nna | 2008/06/13

Previous post: No, "Wow!" to Visitor's story, not "Ja"'s!

Reply to nna
Posted by: nna | 2008/06/13

Wow, "Ja"; that's the kind of SA i'd like my children to love and live in. I don't know how feasible that is though ...
The truth is, we still have a long way to go if the primary mode of describing individuals is on the basis of their skin colour.
I try, myself, but whenever i'm told of a person, the most tempting description to ask for is their race. Sad, but true.
I'm 26, and maybe the ideal will be achieved when my generation dies of. I was too young to fully experience the atrocities of apartheid, but i cannot help but feel angry and wronged, sometimes. Maybe our children will also learn to be bitter from the history books.
I don't know ...

Reply to nna
Posted by: *** dawn*** | 2008/06/13

the black guy is probably sitting and waiting for the white guy to find all the answers. LoL

Reply to *** dawn***
Posted by: t | 2008/06/13

comapring white and black guys I think it all comes from a person how he present himself.

Reply to t
Posted by: Ja | 2008/06/13

Just had that conversation with my wife!! Thank GOODNESS i tell you! When the primaries get out, SA will arrive!

Reply to Ja
Posted by: Visitor | 2008/06/13

the fact that we are still trying to put "black" men and "white" men in boxes means SA has not advanced at all

my daughter aged 6 at the time met a little girl at nursery school. they become fast friends. I wa puzzled as the friend was fluent in afrik and zulu and couldnt speak english so one day i asked my daughter " what colour is she" (see typical South african)well my daughter who thankfully does obviously not see people in colour replied" i dont really know mommy - she is brownish on the outside and her feet are pink!!!" Thank goodness for the next generation

Reply to Visitor
Posted by: Gentle Voice Of Reason (GVOR) | 2008/06/13

First off, Im not a white girl, and Im not into white guys, so just keep that in mind when you read this. Second of all, there's no way you can put black men and white men in boxes the way you just did. Because not all our black brothers are cool and in control, and not all their white counterparts are stressed with hands over their mouths. Ive seen some pretty daft black brothers out there, that you can see is everything but cool and in control, so it depends where you go looking for them, because there are some pretty cool white men out there as well that I've seen, and very much in control.

Here's the thing though, I think the difference between a cool in control black guy and a cool in control white guy, is the white guy usually has an education and money behind his name and the black guy might have an education but the rest is all just an elaborate act of looking well off, usually going out of his way to be well dressed, even if it means putting himself in debt, and trying to look all knowing,granted there are those that actually are intelligent and all knowing. And for anyone who wants to argue my point about the money issue, stats have proven that there are still more rich white people out there than there are blacks, and rich white people leave money behind for their kids, which then leaves you the cool in control rich white guys.

Here's a parting shot, I was in a shop the other day and I saw the coolest sexiest thing Ive seen in a long time, it was a funky cool young white guy, he was having a jolly conversation with the black cashier and the coolest part about it, he was speaking Xhosa, fluently. Now that is cool!

Reply to Gentle Voice Of Reason (GVOR)
Posted by: T | 2008/06/13

Its all about individual charecter dear. Most black guyz look organized on the outset, but if u dig deeper u ll wish u ve never met them. I guess it goes the same as white guyz, they may look stressed on the outset, but digging deeper they are organized, and very successful.

Reply to T

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