Posted by: betrayed | 2008/01/29

betrayed and cheated

Dear Doc,

PLEASE HELP!!! I have been cheated and betrayed, the usual flirting with another woman via the cell phone for MONTHS !! know i have also investigated that he is registered to a site called "singles in the city". i need help, i need to pick myself up and get myself "sorted" out to show him that i am also a person. i am consider myself to be attractive, so what went wrong???? i need to find out where do i go and search for a councellor, life couch, someone that can help me with this pain and humiliation and to show me the ropes. i DO NOT want to be "chucked" away. I WILL make him come back!!!!!

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Do, indeed, see a counsellor to look after your own needs, and issues of self-esteem, assertiveness, and so on. DOn't automatically and unthinkingly set the goal of "MAKING" him come back --- you might be better of without having him back, and if you have to MAKE him com, he'd not be worth having

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Our users say:
Posted by: SR | 2008/01/29

betrayed = step back from the situation and observe. He is distracted and he is busy in all other areas except in the relationship with you. Now ask yourself is this purely because you lack the ability to capture his attention? A case of you not deserving his attention or a case of him just being being plain and simply "absent" when it comes to his committment towards you and relationship.

Even if you were standing behind him while he browses through the website picking out the girls he fancy's and you gave him a hefty Klap against the back of the head and asked him what the fcuk he was up to he'd look at you blankly and firstly say "huh?"

Thats your first sign of "I'm not here" "I'm somewhere else" "Vacant"

Answer = he's not there, he's punch drunk with all that he is caught up in
Solution = Trying to catch his attention is not going to work. Find someone who is worthy of your attention and not the other way around. Dont look for someone you have to be worthy of his attention

Step back and observe ..... dont get sucked into the drama. I know it hurts but separate yourself and see him for the punch drunk silly fool he is right now and let him sink deep. When he lifts his head up, you wont be there no more

Reply to SR
Posted by: Hope* | 2008/01/29

I dont think the fault is yours.  Why do you want a person back who betrayed you and cheated on you? 

Reply to Hope*

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