Posted by: welcome | 2008/06/12


I have a friend that i trust and we work same dept.i discuss personal issues with her and i just find out that whatever i discuss with her she tells the whole people in the office. I am very hurt at the moment i don't know what to do with a friend like this should i confont her or not.

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Our expert says:
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There's an awful current fashion for "Confrontation" which is a truly lousy technique except in special circumstances. TALK about this calmly with your friend, esplaining that you have always felt able to trust her, and want to do so, but are troubled by people round the office telling you that she has shared with them things you thought you had told her in confidence. If you confront, she gets defensive ; if you talk calmly, you may find out what this is about, an may manage to change her way of dealing with your confidences. Maybe she didn't realize you expected these matters to be kept in confidence ? If she has no explanation, no regrets, and no apology, then just modify yout policy and share no further confidences with her

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Our users say:
Posted by: welcome | 2008/06/14

GVOR i agree with you.she must just go to hell. i dont need
her in my life.she is pretending to be caring &loving person while she knows she enjoys gossiping about my life& my family.thanks you saved me.

Reply to welcome
Posted by: Gentle Voice Of Reason (GVOR) | 2008/06/12

Whoa! Who needs enemies with a friend like that? Ones' body language tells you when someone is telling you something in confidence, and from the sounds of it, you were clear about it because personal issues are usually sensitive, so she had no excuse to go and blab her mouth off to other people about things you shared with her obviously in confidence, she should have respected your privacy. She is not trustworthy and therefore useless as a friend. Cut your losses and move along

Reply to Gentle Voice Of Reason (GVOR)
Posted by: Anti-love | 2008/06/12

Oh dear! Nothing in life hurts more than betrayal. I know... Decide if the friendship is worth the effort. If YES, then make the effort.

Reply to Anti-love
Posted by: SR | 2008/06/12

Yes you should say to her that she betrayed your trust and confidentiality and will not be sharing with her in the same way that you did before.

Reply to SR

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