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Question
Posted by: mr t | 2005/07/23

being confused with roommate

I am 21 & in a tertiary institution living with straight guys,i dont know whether i'm straight or not, i sleep on the bed with the other guy in my knowledge he is straight, but last week when we return to school we both arrive at a same day,we didnt arranged that, we slept on the bed as ussual, we ended up doing sex the whole night i'm realy confused because we never spoke about that night. what i want to know is that am i gay?.i want to talk to him about the night but how? & what i felt that night was very nice
i'm scared of being gay & why is this comming at this stage of my life i mean i want to finish my diploma i dont want other things right now i'm realy bussy.

thanks

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageGay, lesbian and bisexual expert

Hi mr t

The incident you describe does not necessarily mean that you're gay. It is very possible that this is a matter of two straight guys who were both horny and had some fun, or were experimenting. It happens and it doesn't automatically mean that either of you are gay. Many straight people have had sexual encounters with people of the same sex. I'm surprised you guys didn't have some form of sexual encounter sooner.

I think what's bothering you is that you're having difficulty in coming to terms with the interaction, in that after a week you guys still haven't discussed it. As if it never happened. It could be that he's feeling the same sense of discomfort or confusion that you're feeling - we don't know. Possibly you're trying to find a meaning or context for your sexual interaction, but it won't help you overcome your anxiety about possibly being gay.

Being gay is not about whether you've had sex with a guy or not - its about being emotionally and sexually attracted to people of the same sex, as opposed to people of the opposite sex. You give no indication of your being attracted to him or other men. Relax and focus on completing your diploma if that's what you need to do but at some point - when you're ready - you'll need to explore your own sexuality.



The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

4
Our users say:
Posted by: Dean | 2006/01/12

I'm kind of horny right now...o sorry, wrong forum

Reply to Dean
Posted by: MPUMI | 2005/07/26

It is all in the mind if you feel that you slept with the guybecause you where attrected to him then you have a major problem.
It could be that you are gay and anyways you say that you can't afford to be in a same sex relationship now does that mean you are considering it for the future? what ever happens i wish you happiness and acceptence to what you are will unburdern you from everything.

Reply to MPUMI
Posted by: Booty Man | 2005/07/25

What kind of school is this? Sharing a bed with someone else is a bit too much! Is that even sanitary? You could sue them for making you gay dude! Seriously... Anyway, I think you should talk to him and try and sort this out or how the hell will you be able to share a bed with him after this? It's Yizo-Yizo's fault, I tell you...

Reply to Booty Man
Posted by: kim | 2005/07/23

it sounds as if u know that u're gay but u dont want to accept it,u'll neva chang eu might as well accept it & go mon with ur life. being gay isn tsomething to be ashamed of u didnt make urself to be like that ma advise to u is that u kalk to someon eu really trust about ur feelings maybe u'll feel better.

Reply to kim

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