Our expert says:
Sounds as if he has been rejected by his mother, and maybe blames you for somehow causing that as pat of the divorce ; and, because he can't take it out on her, takes it out on you and his dad.
Anyhow, he sounds like a truly screwed up kid, and it sounds perfectly reasonable to say that he should not say close to you or visit you until he can get round to cleaning up his act. If Dad still feels sorry for him, why not express that in the form of organizing and maybe even paying for, the kid to see a therapist to work on his problems, rathr than making it easier for the boy to cause greater problems. There's no reason why you should have to tolerate his behavour --- though he might be encouraged to know that he could be wlcomed ack ino the family circle once he can control his misbehaviour.
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