Our expert says:
Its rather normal and common for kids to experiment and explore sexually with on another, and this isn't always considered to be abuse, as usually both parties are willing and curious. Better sex education in the family is the best safeguard against anything untoward happening in this regard. Are you saying that after your father caught you with the boy, you and the boy continued such games or whatever for some years, until the ag of 14 ? Were you a reasonably willing participant ? Or did he have some way of making you do whatever he wanted ?
Whatever happened does seem to have continued to bother you, in terms of issues of intimacy and relationships, and discussing this with a good CBT-oriented counsellor or therapist might be useful. Avoid any psychoanalytically oriented counsellor or therapist like the plague. But with a rational and effective method like CBT, you could sort this out and reain pleasurable control of your life and relationships
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