Posted by: anonymous | 2011/05/26

Are there perhaps others who can identify with this post?

I too feel I am fighting a losing battle but I refuse to give up trying. I will fight until my last breath but this battle is slowly coming to an end as I have not been able to get my eating under control despite being in therapy &  seeing a dietician. It feels as if I have been labelled cursed as every day I start over but I slip. I don''t think I love food but I can''t resist it. If it is there, I have to eat it (no, more like gulp it down). I think I have more a problem with eating than with food itself,. How can someone be so DESPERATE in wanting to firstly be HEALTHY and then an acceptable weight?? I have dieted since 9yrs old but instead have steadily gained weight each year and now weigh 150kgs. I gave up living by punishing myself with food. I am seeing a therapist specializing in eating disorders as well as a dietician, but I am very worried that they are not be able to help me. I know the choice is up to me and noone else but if my greatest wish/desire/dream/goal has been out of my reach for 30odd yrs, then how can I overcome it at this stage in my life? Losing weight is more for health reasons but yet I still can''t stick to a meal plan for 1 week. The frustration and the fact that I feel so useless in not being able to eat like my other family members, makes me feel extremely alienated. My question to you is: " Why am I unable to eat like a normal person i.e. why can''t I eat slowly and chew my food properly? Why must I gulp anything down as if I have been starving? I don''t enjoy the taste of my food as I gulp it down. Is there a psychological reason why some people just can''t seem to sit with a knife and fork and eat bite sizes and chew properly? It''s embarrassing to say, but i feel like a vacuum cleaner.
Graham, you do not need to post a reply to this particular post as I will email you and perhaps we could set up a meeting? However, if you have the time to reply, perhaps other people would find your response helpful.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageEating Disorders Expert

Hi Anonymous,
Sorry for the late reply. It's very difficult to know what to say at this point, as you seem to feel hopeless despite seeing a number of specialist professionals already. I'd be happy to do a re-assessment of your situation if you wish, so feel free to contact me ( if you haven't already) and we can set something up. Although it appears that you likely qualify for Bariatric surgery on your weight, it is very important for you to understand that your eating needs to be well contained throughout your pre-surgical phase if you wish to qualify from the dietetic or psychological perspectives. Bariatric surgery might be an option that you want to consider, but it first needs to be excluded that a healthy diet and moderate exercise not be an option to help resolve your weight condition. I look forward to hearing from you.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: anonymous | 2011/06/11

It''s amazing how alone and shameful we feel re our struggles with food but yet there are so many of us out there. It is sad we live live our lives in constant shame, self-hate and hide ourselves away from the rest of society because we don''t fit in as being acceptable. I hope you are well, Karen?

Reply to anonymous
Posted by: karen | 2011/06/05

I can totally relate to your post! I am 32 years old and have a BMI of 47 (I weight 134kg''s and I am 1.67m tall).
I hide away from life and I am trapped in a world of depression and it''s hard to see a light at the end of the tunnel :-(
Gradually over the years I have just gotten heavier and heavier and I am now the biggest I have ever been.
No one understands how empty and alone I feel and I comfort eat....I don''t eat veggies, fish or much fruit and financially I cannot afford to see anyone to help me...
A friend of mine thinks surgery is the only thing that will help me but I''m so scared of that...
I just don''t know what to do. I wish to be healthy and more active but it''s hard work moving this bady around.
I need to make more effort, I need to find the strength to over come this because I have wasted more than half my life in this nightmare.
All the best to you!!

Reply to karen
Posted by: anonymous | 2011/05/31

Thank you Lee for replying to my post. Congratulations on your weight loss! Your story is very encouraging and I hope I will be able to achieve what you have.

Reply to anonymous
Posted by: Lee | 2011/05/31

I think that therapy will definitely help so that is your first recourse. Good going.
My advice: Drink 2 or 3 glasses of water before eating, especially if you know you are not hungry.
Take a walk a few times a day. Even if just 5 minutes from your front gate, then 5 back. Next week try 10 minutes away and 10 minutes back. Then walk each time you feel like eating unneccesarily. This will prove to yourself that you have power over food. And who knows, it may lead to weight loss and control as it did for me. I lost 30 kilos, slowly, but I finally weigh less than 100kgs and my waist is almost at 100 cm.. this is still obese to some but a major feat for me. You can too. Good luck. Water and Walk!

Reply to Lee

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