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Question
Posted by: naked nun | 2008/06/03

any invisibility cloaks for sale??

...why is it that i get irritated when ppl (specifically men) stare at me when i dress attractively? I HATE that feeling (of NUDITY) so much that i've started to dress like a nun. (too big clothes, muted colours, invisible accessories, no make-up). this is sad, becauese i used to love dressing up and wearing make-up (tastefully)
what can i change about my thoughts that would make me feel dressed when i walk down the street wearing nice clothes? or should i rather wear a 'mask' of make-up to make me feel anonymous? :-P

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Perhaps it depends on the type of staring --- isn't the point of dressing attractively, that others will appreciate and enjoy the effect, and look pleasantly ? "Attractive" is about attracting.
I very much like John's response. Maybe what you consider "attractive" is a style some others find provocative and over-encouraging. Maybe you are misunderstanding and misinterpreting glances of genuine and friendly admiration as something less savoury ? John did NOT "throw it right back at the woman!" and your reaction confirms to me that you are indeed unduly sensitive in this area. He reasonably outlined some poeeible explanations for the uncomfortable way these situations make you feel --- and unquestionably, those alternatives are truly possible. Nobody said any of them are necessarily true in your case.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: anon2 | 2008/06/04

Well said anon !!!! cant agree with ou more. Men will only stare at you if you want them too. Why not just dress appropriately then dressing to get some kind of attention. I just think some women has got the whole concept wrong of respecting there bodies. You can look sexy but smart, but you dont have to be sexy and look like a tramp coming to work. Sometimes i wonder how some women actually leaves home looking like "that" and still think its appropriate. I mean i have seen women with the trend of showing there G STRING, where in hell is that respecting yourself or dressing like that for work.
C'mon ladies respect your bodies.

Reply to anon2
Posted by: Anon | 2008/06/04

Take this coming from a lady ... if it is not for sale, why advertise?

Reply to Anon
Posted by: naked nun | 2008/06/03

john....what a typically defensive male reaction! to throw it right back at the woman! geez...

almost mad...THANK YOU!!!

Reply to naked nun
Posted by: almost mad | 2008/06/03

yeah love, i know the feeling. whats wrong with wearing a sophisticated, but slightly low cut top or wearing a knee length skirt? Wear that and i still get the undressing looks that make me feel naked.Its very irratating and unfair to women who want to look good for themselves because it makes u feel good. I admit sometimes im flattered when a man or women compliments me, but i never like it wen i feel like im being undressed with someones eyes. It is highly insulting. SOme men think we dress up espessially for them. NOT TRUE!

Reply to almost mad
Posted by: John | 2008/06/03

It may be that your definition of 'attractively' coincides with men's definition of 'revealing'. Maybe. It may be that you are misinterpreting an appreciative look for a lascivious one. It may also be that you are walking past a prison where a woman, dressed in a sack cloth, would be applauded. It is highly unusual for men, as an arbitrary group, to stare to the extent that woman feels insulted. That will only happen if one of the three scenarios I suggested occur. But, no, it is not normal, as your female friends will tell you. The comment you make about the mask is most interesting indeed and is a pointer to where the problem is likely to be......

Reply to John

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