Posted by: Beyond Tired | 2004/09/29

Another Ques - How does one know?

Hi again,
Sorry for being mobid but how does one know if you will kill yourself? My friends say my voice is lifeless and they are very worried about me, however the psychologist thinks I am a strong person and will make it, but how do you know? The only reason I have not done it is that my family will be left with my debt and I don't want to do that to them? As for my daughter, she said yesterday that I am not her Mommy anymore, I have changed. I feel dead, no emotions, except anger, which I know is a strong emotion, but I don't vent it or show it, just keep it inside, don't tell people what I really think, keep it to myself. Don't get me wrong I love my daughter as I have said before and the bf, but as I am sitting here it just doesn't seem to matter that much.
To all those that have ever responded to my postings or read them, sorry for this, need to write though and trying to understand -- I feel physically ill plus my legs pain and I can't cry or smile -- lifeless.
Thanks for being here.........
Take Care.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

BT, I'm not sure if there IS any way of knowing, reliably. I also think that you have a lot of strength and CAN make it. Now, when your daughter says you're not like her mommy anymore, she probably does mean that your voice and movements are diferent. The anger is left --- USE it, as a force to revive that deadness, not to move out into overt anger, but as a source of energy --- rather like nuclear power, now aiming at explosions, but at sustainable heat to deliver useful power.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Sassy | 2004/09/29

BT. Have faith and take strength that you are not going commit suicide. The very fact that you are here asking for help shows that you are willing and strong enough to beat this terrible thing called depression. Yes, you've changed, depression will do that to you. But think of your little girl, she needs you now and need her just as much. I know that it feels like nothing is worthwhile anymore but believe me you'll through it. Try talking about what you're feeling and why you're feeling htis way. I found that talking about my troubles to someone i trust with all of my heart and soul has truly helped. If there is no-one currently in your life you feel you can talk to, try a therapist or anyone on this forum, everyone here has gone throught what you're through at some stage in their life. Your current negative attitude towards life is being conveyed to daughter and that is not healthy for either of you. So, come on, put on your best foot forward and let's beat this together. You have more support here then you think you do. I'll be here cheering you on and giving you all the support you need.

Reply to Sassy
Posted by: Q | 2004/09/29

Hi BT,

hEY GIRL DONT GET STUPID NOW!!!! You are at n very low point in your life and thing that matter is tarting to become watered down and as you said it just does not matter. Yes you have changed and your daughter i recone is very young and if she said you changed take note. Now come on girl you are better than this and you are strong, yes you have deap depression but you can beat this, the why you are moving now you are a prime candidate for suaside because of the deminising value you put to al that you love and hold dear to you!!! We need you hear and your daughter needs you even more now not including the rest of the people in your live!!!! You have had so much impact on peoples lives and has done somuch good dont brake them now and geus what you need your self so find her quick, we all love you dont become anoughter CA you dont desurve it nor did she!!! You are spesial if you have not notised and beleave me there is only one off you on this earth and you have so much still to do and acomplish!!! Come on lets nail this thing called live because we are the best!!!

Reply to Q

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