Posted by: exhausted | 2006/10/25

Angry husband causing me extreme misery

We've been married 20 years. My husband is an extremely miserable and angry man. Hardly ever smiles or laughs unless some vulgar joke is made. He shows an angry face to my entire family and talks to them abruptly. They all feel that he sees them as being inferior to him. Let's not even talk about road rage as that is the worst. HE on the other hand tells me that he is not an angry man and I always find fault in him. Everybody I know is afraid of his ways, and because of me, they will not tell him off. Therefore, I try to talk to him as I'd rather it comes from me than others, but he thinks I'm a nag. I honest to God cannot continue like this anymore. All I'm asking for is for him to NOT BE ANGRY and BE PLEASANT. Please, anyone, help me. I need advice from anyone. Thank you very much.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

You seem to be describing a long-standing situation, so maybe what has changed recently isn't his bad behaviour, but your no longer feeling prepared to tolerate it. Can't yopu persuade him to join you in mariage counselling, eg through FAMSA ?
As Momof3 says, some people become even grumpier as they get older, and especially if a man feels he's in a dead-end job and unlikely to achieve what he'd hoped for. And as a wife memorably sayd : "Some mornings I wake up grumpy, and sometimes I leave him to stay asleep."

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Our users say:
Posted by: tired | 2006/10/26

You have my symp. Mine have "stil stuipe" most of the time. Days go by where he doesn't even talk to me. When he talks to the children is when he is tongue lashing them! Be strong en take your problem to God, because he will carry you through this!

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Posted by: Momof3 | 2006/10/26

Hi exhausted.
He sounds like most men of his age 40+ ANGRY OLD MEN. Maybe its a hormone thing-Do men have menopause? It sure seems like it.!! LOL
Some people are just born angry and grumpy. Has he always been like this or has he become like this over the years. He might not be showing his true feelings here.he could be scared or anxious about something and taking out on those that he loves. It might be a good idea to let a doctor examine him or to go for anger management classes.

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