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Question
Posted by: Beyond Tired | 2004/10/28

An Observation

Hi guys and gals, CS,
I have observed of late that we are all becoming a wee bit nasty, is it that time of year? People have asked some serious questions and been made fun of, I am not talking about the condom/HIV issue, I am talking about the serious issues of Love, hurting, pain, discomfort, sadness, etc. Is it my imagination or are we attacking one another?

I just want to share something too, although I am still struggling with my own feelings and emotions, it is great to be able to talk to others, read their problems and sometimes be able to give advice, maybe not always the right advice but to give constructive and useful advice, not break the person down or make fun of them.

I have always been less trustworthy of the human race and it is difficult for some to talk, so this forum is a kind of safe haven in a way. We all make mistakes and need answers and I really think that if you don't have something constructive to add, don't, rather keep it to yourself or just make a note that is nice.......

Sometimes tough love is required, such as what I needed, some tough words to make me think and start acting and stop wallowing. Sometimes being cutting and bitchy is the way to go, but be careful. Everyone in this world has a story, a problem, a life full of experience, different experiences, different lessons have been learnt and we all have different perspectives, let's try and be nice, it is the only way to creat a better place for all.

Take Care One and ALL, may you be blessed with only what is good and kind and be filled with happiness. Let the pain go and live the moment, forget the past and live for tomorrow, love your children and embrace the love given to you.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Maybe these have been some examples of a cross between Burnout in people under chronic stress ( just try not to make an ash of yourself, I say ) ; and what in the helping professions often gets called "COmpassion Fatigue" ?
But thanks for your kindly, compassionate, and well-expressed thoughts, as ever, and Shaun.
And isn';t a little bit of the problem, that sometimes what we need isn't what we want, and what we want isn't always what we need ?

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: Shaun | 2004/10/28

Hi People,

Coz I know a lot of you will read this, I would like to add, that although BT brings up a nagging issue that sometimes makes the person feel bad that they even "aired" their problems/queries, we will always get those that will undoubtedly have their own words to offer. Be it helpful or not. As CS often suggests, & I know it may sometimes not be easy, just ignore the rude & hurtful comments.

We all come here for advice & support, & most defintely some of it is not going to be what you are looking for or even needing at that moment. But, read it, take what you need from it, & just let the rest be. See, I feel that if you retort then you are engaging them in conversation, which was most probably what they were looking for in the first place.

As the good book says, turn your face & offer the other cheek. So seeing as we are on-line, just say thank you for your comments & they are much appreciated.

Remember, the bottom line is, you get upset or hurt because you allow them to get to you, & the important thing is you need to take care of you. So take what you want, ignore what you don't

Now I hope nobody chews my "words" off, but I do feel strongly that we all come here for support & sometimes, it may not be what we had hoped for...

Cheers,
Shaun

PS: Good point BT

Reply to Shaun
Posted by: Inc | 2004/10/28

Wise words BT. I do agree... Those who come here, do so in search of answers... nobody knows everything... but most of us know things because life has taught us lessons... how blessed are we to be here, so that we can share our knowledge and help each other.

Reply to Inc

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