Posted by: Stresd out | 2008/07/16

am i being ridiculous?

Hi CS ,i have a problem ,i am 23yrs,have a job ,have a car,and a baby (16mths) i am not married,i dropped out of varsity in 2005 due to financial constraints,i work in the insurance industry processing claims,but i feel i can do better,i get sooo hurt when i hear of someone I was at school with who is qualified and all that,sometimes i get ashamed and feel i have ruined my life by having a baby and not finishing also,i grew up in soweto and my friends there ,i know they envy me right now but i cant help feel like a failure ,i want to be qualified also but its also tough studying while working since this year i tried but failed i am so hurt ,i dont wanna be hear right now ,i also want to be somebody ,is that too much to ask?i want to be respected do something that makes sense ,,,,,

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Our expert says:
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In some ways, we can all consider outselves a failure by inding someone who has apparently done better thann us ; or we can consider opurselves a success, by comparing ourselves to somweone who has done less well. Yes, of course, having a baby when young radically alters one's life, and its a pity more girls don't really seem to realize that. But we can't revise our history, we can only rise above it and work towards a better future. Studying while working is indeed tough, but it's possible, and in time you will manage.
And also, remember --- you already ARE somebody, and you are what is called " a work in progress" --- not complete yet, so you are still becoming an even more interesting and successful somebody. Most people who really succeed in life work at it long and hard ; only in movies or TV does it appear to happen quickly and easily. And first of all respect yourself ; others won't easily respect someone who doesn' already espect themselves

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Stresd out | 2008/07/16

Thanks to all for the motivation,i will try harder and one day will let you know i got my degree!! thanks a lot

Reply to Stresd out
Posted by: Zee | 2008/07/16


I hope this will help

I studied for a degree did not find a job relevant but I kept on studying no luck there again. I am currently studying for somethng else luckily I got a job in the field they paid me peanuts but I worked my butt off, asked for an increase was told u haven't completed ur degree. I am now serving my notice going to work for another company a great salary, I am still studying as I need to complete my degree I have one year old twins who want my attention when I get home, my point is go back to school at least u have one baby u can make if you try, I suppose feeling the way you will help motivate u. And by the way I am in my late thirties I felt like I wasted my life but now things are shaping up. So take heart.

Reply to Zee
Posted by: Lolo | 2008/07/16

Don't stress, we really don't know how other people suceed, we are not the same and we will never be so stop comparing yourself to them in such a way that u become depressed insted use it as a motive.

i work and study, have a baby who is demanding too much of my time and used to have a hubby too demanding.

try to study in the morning your mind is fresh and revitalized, is never too late and i'm glad you wanna be somewhere.


Reply to Lolo
Posted by: Babe | 2008/07/16

Hey Stresd out

I know what u r going through.... been there

I earn a great salary and is currently a supervisor but due to not having a degree yet, I can not move up the corporate ladder. I am studying for a BCom degree through UNISA and it is difficult having three young kids, a hubby and a home I have to see to, but I have learnt that every little bit counts. I do three or two modules per semester and is currently busy with my third year modules and only have seven more to go.

It is difficult concentrating on your studies with responsibilities but believe me it can be done.

U can do it!

Reply to Babe

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