Our expert says:
Breaking up is a sad experience, even if it is the very best thing to do. But the sadness usually lasts much less long that you expect. Now, as for feeling afraid to be alone and needing a guy as some sort of security blanket, that speaks of significant problems with self-esteem and self-confidence --- see a good local counsellor, preferably one using CBT methods, and solve those problems. As you become less needy, you'll be better able to make sustaining and lasting healthier relationships. Yes, its an opportunity for growth --- seize the opportunity. You're not pathetic, and CBT will help you to stop feeling as though you are !
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