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Question
Posted by: Free 66 | 2003/03/20

Age old age question

Ek (23) het n miesie ontmoet van (16). Ons is nou goeie vriende en die ding is ons is besig om verlief opmekaar te raak. In die begin was ek baie skepties oor ons a.g.v die ouderdom verskil maar ek is objektief oor die saak maar kan nie fout vind met n verhouding nie. Sy voel die selfte oor die saak. Ons het besluit as daar iets van dit sou kom gaan ons verstandig in n verhouding ingaan. VRAAG: Sal so verhouding kan werk of is die ouderdom verskil net te groot tussen ons?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Free 66, if you consider that you are being "objective" about developing an emoptional relationship with a girl of 16, then you maybe don't know what "objective" means --- hardly anyone is objective aout any emotional relationship. And were this "objectivity" involves deciding that it's OK, when you know how many people would object to such a relationship, it sounds more self-serving than objective. You are old enough to know the many reasons why this plan is unwise ; including potential legal and criminal problems arising from it
So your actual question attends to the least urgent part of the issue. An age difference of x many years doesn't automatically doom a relationship. But forming a serious relationship with a child of 16, who is still a long way from being emotionally mature enough either to understand the potential problems, or to give legal consent, or to be able to honestly make any long-term commitment, is hardly likely to be the basis for a stable, happy or lasting relationship.

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