advertisement
Question
Posted by: Sam | 2007/04/11

Advise please

My husband of 12 years has moved out of our house AGAIN for the 8th time in 3 years, in the past he has always gone off 'to find himself'-thinks he got married too young and wants to still experience the bachelor life. He has also had an affair in the past and I would not be suprised if he isn't having one now. My question is, I really do want to move on and get on with my life without him and all the heartache of him leaving and messing me around. Once again, I have taken this really badly and am battling to cope, i can't sleep, eat etc. I have an appointment with a psychologist tomorrow coz everyone says councelling does help, I want to know how it is going to help? I miss him so badly and at times feel like I would rather just end it so I don't have to feel this heartache but we have 2 kids, so I would never do that. I know I sound like the battered wife that keeps going back for more, but how do I get him out my system and stop loving him

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

If he has been dithering like this for 12 years, and after 8 searches still hasn't "found himself" maybe he needs a map ? In other words, he is never going to "find himself" by this daft way of searching, but could sort this out probably fairly rapidly, with a good CBT counsellor / therapist.
As to how counselling can help, discuss this with your own psychologist, after outlining the current problem as you see it.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

1
Our users say:
Posted by: Phil | 2007/04/11

You have to make a concious decision that you will not allow him or YOURSELF to hurt you so much. Remember, staying in this you are allowing yourself to be tortured. Make a mental decsion that you want out. Then the most important, cut the contact and move on. I found that once you made the mental decision, and you keep the contact only to the kids the pain goes away the fastest. Good luck.

Reply to Phil

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
advertisement