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Question
Posted by: Bettie | 2006/07/31

Advise Please???

Doc please advise. I got involved with a man. He is married but separated. When we met he was “in the process” of getting a divorce. He is now separated from his wife for 7 months already and he is waiting for her to make the first move. She has started the divorce but then withdrew it a month ago and now does not want to give him a divorce. I cannot handle this situation, because although they are separated, he is still not free to have a life with me and is still legally married to her. Seems like they are playing cat and mouse games with each other because they just cannot seem to get to some agreement with each other, and I am sitting on this side very insecure and I don’t know what to do. Am I wasting my time here, or what do you suggest I do. I mean they have been divorcing since December and its getting nowhere, in the meantime I have to put my life on hold . Can somebody refuse to divorce you, and do you have to stay married to that person for ever?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Sounds complex, doesn't it ? If he's waiting for her to move, and she knows that you are seeing him, she may well coose not to move at all. Don't get involved in any games they are playing between themselves. If his wife took the initiative to start a divorce process, she is entirely entitled to qithdraw / stop it and continue to be married to him . HE can start divorce proceedings against her, if he chooses to do so. Don't hold your breath waiting for them to stop their games

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Our users say:
Posted by: Lee | 2006/07/31

Don't sit around waiting for him, if you carry on with your life he might speed up the process. I was also involved with a married man who had seperated, we even had a child while he was seperated but couldn't cut ties with his wife. I told him straight that I wasn't prepared to wait any longer, I met someone new after being with him(Married Guy) for 2 years. He couldn't handle me being with someone else and sped up the procedings of his divorce. We are now married.

YOURS MIGHT NOT TURN OUT LIKE MINE DID BUT IT'S WORTH A TRY. DON'T WAST YOUR LIFE WAITING FOR HIM AS THEY MAY NEVER GET DIVORCED.

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