Our expert says:
Your feelings are very understandable, with someone who behaves hatefully towards you. But recognize that though your anger is justifiable and understandable, it isn't useful --- it doesn't really make you feel better ( probably, worse ) and doesn't change her behaviour. Your positive impulses are creditable, though I doubt that anyone will be able to talk any more sense into her head, unless she recognizes her alcohol and related problems and gets gerself sincerely into proper therapy with a shrink.
It sounds as though he may be a genuinely nice guy, with lasting care for his kids, and een the self-destructive ex --- don't plan on any long-term relationsip with him unless you can manage a long-term relationship with them, too, perhaps a close and affectionate one with the children, maybe a cautious and more distant one with his Ex.
Maybe it'd be a worthwhile investment for you and he to see a relationship counsellor to work out the best way of achieving this ? And you, individually, deserve some individual counselling, to recognize how very much you ARE worth, and that you do deserve and can achieve happiness. CBT counselling is espeially good at helping one defeat habits of negativism
The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal
advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.