Our expert says:
Gay, lesbian and bisexual expert
Hi Miss G and thanks for posting.
DON'T (I repeat, DO NOT) take acid or any other drug, and don't use the anaesthetic cream Spiderman refers to - pain during anal sex is indicative of a problem and drugs or anaesthetic creams simply mask this pain.
Instead, plenty of s l o w and g e n t l e anal foreplay should relax you. Gentle slow anal stimulation – touching, rimming, teasing, more touching, more rimming, more teasing, gentle slow fingering and lashings of lube – should help relax you. Ensure your confidence by being clean – we addressed douching before on the forum – and don’t be shy to touch, caress, lube, finger and explore your own anus during foreplay. Explore toys – a small butt plug or dildo, well lubricated and inserted very slowly, can encourage that inner sphincter muscle to cooperate. Always take your time – be slow and gentle until your arse literally asks for more. Never force it – at the slightest indication of pain or discomfort back off slightly until you’re more comfortable and then slowly proceed further. Alter the angle of penetration until it feels just right – we’re all unique and we need to find the right angle for comfortable penetration. This could imply the position you use or the relative height or angle you assume in relation to your partner’s thrusts.
Above all, take your time – there is absolutely no rush. If it doesn’t happen, be OK with that.
Please feel free to post again.
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