Posted by: Kitty | 2018/11/05

Stuck in a rut

This seems very stupid if you compare it to other people's problems but I really don't know anymore. So I used to weigh 103 kg's, and eventually lost weight, I weighed 57. I was fit and healthy and I maintained it for many years. But from this year, I just totally lost my reason and my motivation to lose weight. I eat too much and don't exercise, I’m just not in the mood. I just feel better when I eat things, I’ve always been an emotional eater. So I tried to figure out what the issue here is, why I can't get back on track, so I picked up more than 10 kg this year. I find I feel so happy being at home cooking delicious food for the kids and being at home with them. But my husband is also there, and he watches the kids when I go for a run, so I do have that support, but lately I just don't want to go run. And I just want to eat things, but at the same time I dread picking up weight and I just know I don't ever want to be where I was in the beginning. I don't know how to get out of this rut, I'm weighing 69 at the moment. Everyone is commenting on how I'm picking up weight, which I know I am, but I don't know where to start. I don't know how to get my head in that space again. My mother in law passed away in March and it hit us quite suddenly, so I don't know if that is part of the reason. She used to stay with us in a garden flat, and always helped and assisted with things around the house and the kids. And then BAM, she just wasn't there anymore. It's seems so silly because I didn't lose weight for her or anything but maybe just the shock to the system, I don't know. Any advice?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink
- 2018/11/07

Hi Kitty,
There's nothing silly about this at all.  If it troubles you, then it should be taken seriously. The sudden loss of your mother-in-law is surely relevant, but whatever is going on is complex, but manageable.  What would probably help most, would be for you to see a clinical psychologist who can provide a modern and effective method of psychotherapy / counselling such as CBT ( Cognitive-Behaviour Therapy ) which has been shown by good research to be effective in a realistically short amount of time, helps you to sort out your habits of thought and behaviour which are being unhelpful in your life, and learning how to modify these and regain better control of your life.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Anonymous | 2018/11/07

Hi. Yes you may be grieving and dealing with the change of things around you. Very understandable. I am sure she complimented you when you lost weight, right? So take that run and think of her, do it in her honour. But, most of all do it for yourself. Most of us WISH we could lose weight and shape up the way you have. I have to get up and exercise and I am a fat lump myself, but once lost keeping me there would be a bliss. Be proud of yourself and accept you slipped up or over-reacted to a death in this way. But, now is the time to work on things even harder. You are sooooo worth it and by Christmas you can have last almost 5kg or more I imagine? You go girl!!! And well done!!! You can maybe also see a Counsellor to help you with your grief.

Reply to Anonymous
Posted by: Anonymous | 2018/11/06

I think you should be a bit kind to yourself. You have suffered the loss of a person who was clearly significant in your life and you are going through a very stressful time. It is normal, I think, to experience some degree of depression when losing a loved one and as you said, you are an emotional eater so it all makes sense. I am a serial dieter myself, so I understand completely where you are coming from. I went onto Banting and I must say that it is the only diet I have been able to sustain because it is high in fat (good fat) and fat helps to make you feel satisfied and not hungry. There is a lot about Banting and LCHF on the internet. I hate exercise, and really and truly if I am running, you better run too because something is wrong. Bur seriously though, try dancing while doing the chores or running around with the kids tossing a ball etc is also great exercise without you even know you are doing it because you are having fun. And of course, there is always the option of an anti depressant and some counselling to help you deal with the loss of your loved one and to get back on track emotionally. Best of luck to you xx

Reply to Anonymous

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