Our expert says:
Someone who is close enough to you, and knows you ell enough to make you happy, is also ideally placed to make you feel bad. If he has possible psych problems, he needs to see a good shrink for a proper assessment to identify the problems and discuss possible treatments.
There are many possible reasons for someone to behave in the ways you describe, usually not bipolar disorder. And remember that not all sadness is Depression.
If he is experiencing a severe Depression, it is his responsibility to see a psychiatrist or at least a good GP, privately or through a state hospital or clinic, to get assessed and treated.
Leaving it without proper treatment is unfair to both of you. The same applies if you suffer from depression. A mutually toxic environment isn't good for either of you, either. Love is important, but in this sort of situation, it often is not enough. You should never accept being a punching bag.
"Drug use" never ever helps anyone to cope with anything. That's merely an occasional illusion.
Why not discuss this frankly and calmly with him, and agree that you each need to get help and sort yourselves out, and that in the meantime you are not being good for each other. Each of you needs to save themselves, before you can have any realistic chance to save yourself.
Each of you, get the proper help you need and deserve
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