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Question
Posted by: Jules | 2005/11/29

7 reasons not to mess with a child



> 7 reasons not to mess with a child
>
> A little girl: was talking to her teacher about whales.
>
> The teacher: said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow
> a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was
> very small.
>
> The little girl: stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
>
> Irritated, the teacher: reiterated that a whale could not swallow a
> human; it was physically impossible.
>
> The little girl: said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
>
> The teacher: asked, " What if Jonah went to hell?"
>
> The little girl: replied, "Then you ask him".
>

> A Kindergarten teacher: was observing her classroom of children while
> they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each
> child's work.
>
> As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked
> what the drawing was.
>
> The girl: replied, "I'm drawing God."
>
> The teacher: paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
>
> Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl:
> replied, "They will in a minute."
>
>
> A Sunday school teacher: was discussing the Ten Commandments with her
> five and six year olds.
>
> After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother,
> she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our
> brothers and sisters?"
>
> Without missing a beat one little boy: (the oldest of a family)
> answered, "Thou shall not kill."
>
>
>
> One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the
> dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
>
> She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of
> your hairs white, Mom?"
>
> Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and
> make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
>
> The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then
> said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"
>
>
>
> The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to
> persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
>
> "Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown
> up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's
> a doctor.'
>
> A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the
> teacher, She's dead. "
>
>
>
> A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying
> to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head,
> the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the
> face.."
>
> "Yes," the class said.
>
> "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary
> position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
>
> A little fellow shouted,
>
> "Cause your feet ain't empty."
>
>
>
> The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary
> school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.
> The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:
>
> "Take only ONE. God is watching."
>
> Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was
> a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
>
> A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the
> apples.
>
>
> It doesn't matter how many people you send this to, just remember if
> it made you laugh, your friends will laugh too.

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Our users say:
Posted by: lee | 2005/11/29

lol - i loved the 10 commandments one... hehe.. I think we've all felt like killing our siblings at one time or other

Reply to lee
Posted by: Jillybean | 2005/11/29

LOL Thanx for this one Jules!! ;-)

Reply to Jillybean

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