Posted by: kallie | 2007/05/16

52 yr old bully at work

Believe it or not i work with a 52 year old bully. (I am 45) If she does not get her way than she becomes abusive and throws a tantrum. Everyone in the office is petrified of her - not only does she have a tantrum but she threatens with "im going to bliksem you". One day i decided to fight back because i am now tired of being bullied around - i mean why should i not stand up for my self. Unfortunately everyone heard the heated argument and i ended up looking like the bad one. She proceeded to tell the whole office and i ended up being ignored. I must just mention that i am also scared of her which i think she takes advantage of.
I dont understand what am i doing wrong and how do i handle a granny bully.
Can someone out there please give me tips on how to handle a bully in the office place.

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Our expert says:
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If the rest of the office are ignoring you for having stood up to this pathetic bully, then they're a bunch of pathetic dweebs. Why is everyone so scared of her ? Do you really fear that she will be violent ? ( If so, maybe someone ought to record her threats and call the police and get a restraining order in court. What sort of clot is your boss to not notice and do nothing ? Isn't there an HR person or dept . ?
Good advice all round --- and RMC's "Please don't hit me again !" could be a fruitful tactic.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Gracie | 2007/05/17

There are laws that protect people in the workplace against bullies like her! You can try calling the CCMA - they might be able to assist you.

On the other hand and so sorry for being crude, it is not in my nature to be like tha, but people like her get mu back up : buy the bitch a dildo and tell her to go f***** herself!!

Reply to Gracie
Posted by: Koos | 2007/05/17

Kick her in the ... you know where.... lol

Reply to Koos
Posted by: kallie | 2007/05/17

Thank you all for your advise and i will definately put them in place - i will take the matter further and ensure from now on to take a note of incidents.
I cant believe i have allowed myself to be taken in by such a bully. But when she walks into the office i can already see the bully come out in her and i immediately feel myself changing. I hate feeling this way

Reply to kallie
Posted by: HR | 2007/05/17

As some1 who works in Hr report her for two things threatening your well being and the new one provocatin to your supervisor if she is your sup, inform the next person in line, personally i keep a ercord of all incidents even when you report it and nothing is done about go to your senior about it because if you take matters inti your hands like before you will get into trouble i sorted out my bully who is 55 and im 23 by simple getting my job done way before deadlines and then each time she comes into the office tryin to intimidate me i simpl say if its not work related then we have nothing else to discuss and my stuff has been approved. there was a vacancy for a supervisor post and she is shit scared ill get it and be her supervisor but i did not apply cause i got a better offer
. everyday i answer when spoken to and keep her out of my way through music and cutting her short when she gets too excited..
the bully she must be feeling threatened or Menopause and is adjusting working with younger folk, but she has a problem and dont let that cause one for you, i learnt that being silent even when you shuold speak up makes one feel like a fool, as i type now she is curious to see and i told her to respect my space. the good news is i got a Management position and no one knows and she will report to me through my current supervisor who is also not fun to work with because of her tantrums. relax doors will open and she will remain

Reply to HR
Posted by: JUST ME | 2007/05/17

You know what - If you are doing your work to the best of your ability then you are doing nothing wrong - some people just can't help being arsholes. Unless she is your direct superior, I would just ignore her and if she tries to bully you or order you around, brush her off and pretend that you can't hear her. If she is your direct superior or one that you report to then, address the issue with your HR department or MD and you will find that half the people will quietly support your complaint. I have a person around my office that is a bully and gets away with it because everyone is afraid of a tongue lashing by her. Fighting with her just gets me down, so now I have taken away the power she has over me by pretending that she does not exist. She will get her come-uppance in due course. Someone that is influential in the company will step up to the job very soon and put her in her place. Nothing you can do will change her, so, for your own peace of mind, take away the power she has over you by ignoring her and her tantrums - walk on, shoo her away and laugh. I can assure you that all in the office call her names under their breath - so infact, she is not getting away with it. We had two bullies until the 18th of April when he was escorted from the building, now we only have 1 - so how is that for justice?.

Reply to JUST ME
Posted by: RMC | 2007/05/17


Take it up with IR, tell them she has threatened you and you fear for her safety. And try this - if you are working and she approaches you, scream, take a defensive position and say "PLLEASE!!!! don't hurt/hit me again!" and make sure everyone says it!

Reply to RMC
Posted by: cv | 2007/05/17

Dont your company have a IR department,make a case against her.

Reply to cv

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