Posted by: Concerned Mom | 2008/06/24

4 Year old bed wetting

I have a problem with my 4 year old, i am not sure how to handle the situation. SHe wets the bed every now and again. We have threatened to by her baby nappies and to tell people, but this didn't see to help.

The past month has really been tough on the family, her sister aged 16 past away and this seems to be worrying her, she constantly tells us that she misses her and asks if she is still sick in heaven.

Also I am six months pregnant, she is very proud that she is having a little brother and talks about the baby constantly.

Could all this be the cause of the bed wetting? How do I handle the situation?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Threats really never help, and, though understandable, may make things worse. I really think the very likely cause is the recent loss of her sister --- kids stressed in such ways often regress to an earlier stage of development, and may start bedwetting or even soiling themselves for a short while. I wouldn't expect a physical reason to be likely ( other than if there is a urine infection, which little girls can catch fairly easily ) as she has already BEEN successfully dry for some time before this.
IN this situation you are all under a great deal of stress, and being soothing and supportive ti each other will help you all. TLC all round is needed and deserved. She is likely to regain control before long. And as Kay reminds me, pharmacies like Clicks sell packs of 20 Linen Protectors, like a flat nappy, that you can place between her and the sheets, that absorb a modest wetting, and limit the extent of the mess

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Our users say:
Posted by: T | 2008/06/24

sorry for your loss. maybe you should take her to see a psycologist. you guys have been through a great deal. good luck with your pregnancy

Reply to T
Posted by: Kay in Gtown | 2008/06/24

If I may suggest... do what they do in geriatric wards and buy some rubber-type mattress protectors and cut some sheets into halves or thirds and make her bed up with this on top of her usual sheet. Tell her that this way it won't matter if she accidentally wets the bed, because it will be easy to wash.
It sounds like she's been through an awful amount of upheaval recently for a 4-year old and this is probably just her response to the anxieties. It'll pass. I really wouldn't worry about it, or stress her more about it - she is asleep and can't help it. And 4 yrs is young - my girls both sometimes wet the bed later than that age if something had upset them.
Just make it easier for yourself to clean up and wash, so you don't have to fret as much, and give her lots of love... and take care of yourself too, I'm really sorry to hear about the bereavement... sounds like you all need some TLC.

Reply to Kay in Gtown
Posted by: Maria | 2008/06/24

Have you had her checked out by a paed or gp to make sure that there isn't a physical reason, like a bladder infection? Has she always done this or was she dry and then the problem started?

She is not doing it on purpose, so please don't threaten her. Make sure she doesn't drink lots of fluid close to bedtime, and goes to the toilet just before she goes to bed. Keep talking to her in a reassuring way about all the big changes and stress in your lives. Ask her if she is perhaps scared to get up and go to the toilet at night for some reason.

Reply to Maria
Posted by: marianne | 2008/06/24

Ask your doctor about Tofranil (spelling?) it works wonders with children that have a bed wetting problem. And there is normally an underlying emotional problem to bed wetting.

Reply to marianne

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