If you're tired of being a nobody, here are 10 ways you too can hit the SA newspapers and have your fifteen minutes of fame, says Susan Erasmus.
Interrupt Julius Malema during a press conference. Whatever you do, just mention the word 'Sandton'. It will go down a treat – and so will you. Especially if you are pointing out the bleeding obvious, namely that once again, the pot is calling the kettle black.
Touch someone on their studio. Mr Visagie of the AWB will be remembered for his 'studio' comment long after no one can remember a single other thing about him. The whole country has been wondering for a week: where exactly is someone's studio? It has a sort-of below-the-waist feel to it, not so? Well, it certainly is not an earlobe.
Wave an old SA flag. Not entirely sure where one would find one of these. Certainly not in a flag shop in Long Street. Waving one of these is about as offensive as the by-now-notorious Boer song. It is bound to get you in the papers, especially if you're at a political meeting or a sports event. Dan liewer die Vierkleur, mense.