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 Tips & techniques
Positions women like

Here comes that generalisation again, and with it the knowledge that at least one reader will say, "But I'm not like that". Okay, let's say that many - not all - women enjoy these lovemaking positions.

 
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Call us indulgent, but most men enjoy seeing their partners having an orgasm. Here are a few of the positions many women find gives them the most pleasure, along with some tips for men on maximising the enjoyment for both of you.

Astride
You lie on your back, perhaps with a pillow under your bottom. Once she's on top of you and you're inside her, you can tilt your pelvis forward a bit, which allows her to grind hers more directly against it. Many women find this a reliable way of having a clitoral orgasm, especially if they lie on top of you. She may prefer you to lie still and let her control the rhythm of her movement. Don't worry - it'll be pleasant for you too.

Your partner may also prefer to remain erect, resting her weight on her hands while moving rhythmically up and done. This enables her to move her G-spot against the head or shaft of your penis.

This position can be hugely enjoyable position for both of you. Your partner may heighten the sensation for both of you by squeezing her kegel muscles. Exotic sex manuals talk about women turning around while astride the man, but feats like these have more value as a novelty than heightened pleasure. Try it, but don’t be disappointed if it doesn’t work out. There are plenty of other options.

The intimate missionary
It's a much-maligned position, but many women love it. It allows full-length, skin-to-skin touching and eye contact. Try putting your arms around your partner and holding her close to you. You can also hold yourself up on your arms and move inside her, very slowly and rhythmically, rather than frantic rodeo-type thrusting. Try putting a pillow under her bottom.

Making a stand
For this you'll need a very sturdy surface, at about waist height. If it's a cold, hard or rough surface, your partner will appreciate a towel between it and her bottom. Some men go on about the value of a rumbling, vibrating tumble-drier to add extra sensation. If you're comfortable with your partner calling out the name of the manufacturer while in the throes of passion, switch on the machine.

The reason so many women like this position is that it allows contact with the G-spot. Some women find it the only position in which they can ejaculate, often a highly erotic experience for both partners. She should probably be fully aroused before you enter her, as you'll be penetrating her deeply.

Depending on where you do this - a fallen tree in the middle of the Okavango, against a lifeboat on a cruise liner, under a full moon in Venice - there'll also be an element of danger or intrigue. So this isn't the time for lingering, all-night intimacy, but rather the cut-to-the-action sort. Gauge your partner's mood right and your have a recipe for brief, explosive sex. It’s no replacement for the lingering, romantic sort, just a whizz-bang alternative.

Spoons in the sack
This is a slow, intimate position that can feel enormously erotic. Your partner lies on her side and you nestle in her back, letting you guide your penis inside her. There's no eye contact unless you have a strategically placed mirror (Not a bad idea if your partner fancies it), but it does allow you to rub and stroke her body and to kiss, lick and nuzzle her neck, back and ears. And of course, you can give her a running commentary on how good she makes you feel.

Stoop lively now
Not all women are wild about “doggy style” as it can seem a bit impersonal, but if the mood is right and she's confident that you're not fantasising about her sister it can be very exciting. You can do this standing, kneeling or lying down. For the latter you can put a pillow under her pelvis, and enter her vagina from behind, resting your weight on your hands.

Standing or kneeling affords the deepest penetration, and you can hold your partner's hips in your hands and control your thrusting with her pelvic movements and yours. – (William Smook)

Visual guides of sex positions
Classic positions
Sitting and standing positions
Rear entry positions
Woman on top

Read more:
Things women wish you knew
Any questions? Ask our sexologist

 
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