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 Abuse
Breaking the silence after sexual abuse

Ma Agnes, familiar to Isidingo fans, is currently speaking out about being raped 26 years ago. Why do so many people remain silent when this happens to them?

According to Shariefa Goliath, counselling coordinator at Rape Crisis, it can take several years before survivors of sexual abuse decide to report the crime.

 
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Young children may not understand what is happening, especially when the perpetrator is an adult and someone they trust. They may sense that it is wrong but because of the power imbalance and age difference, they feel helpless to do anything to stop it.

Sexual abuse is a secretive crime, often involving bribery and threats. Agnes told Zeb how she was constantly threatened not to tell anyone about the abuse.

It is common for survivors to blame themselves for what had happened. “If only I did this or that, it wouldn’t have happened or I could’ve stopped it” are common thoughts according to Goliath. It may take years before people start to accept that they are not to blame.

In order to survive, people often deny that the abuse had taken place and try to block out memories of the events. Without help, some survivors struggle to come to terms with what had happened and may develop problems such as eating disorders, depression or substance abuse, according to Ms Goliath.

Sexual abuse has a huge effect on people’s ability to trust others and some survivors may find it difficult to form relationships later in life.

For more information on sexual abuse and for telephone numbers of organisations in your area, contact Rape Crisis at (021) 447 1467.

- Ilse Pauw, Health24

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