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 Dating
10 signs of a one-night stand

The light of day brings both sanity and a good deal of remorse. She has left and you're not sure what happens now. Last night was wonderful, but you've been down this road before and now you wonder - again – whether the phone is going to ring.

 
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Pitfalls of a one-night stand
"A one-night-stand between two consenting single adults is not necessarily a bad thing," says Ilse Terblanche, clinical psychologist.

"Someone may wish to remain single at a specific time in their lives, but everyone has sexual needs. However, there is always a risk that one or both partners can be hurt. The problem arises if one party has expectations of a possible relationship. We cannot predict or control someone else's reactions and emotions and one needs to accept that fact before one decides to go for it," she added.

There is always the risk of sexually transmitted infections (STIs).

"If you enjoy having one-night-stands, make sure to always use condoms. In the heat of the moment it is very tempting to throw condoms out of the window. Safer sex should be non-negotiable. People might be dishonest or might not know whether they have an infection or not. That's why it is important to treat every sexual partner as if he/she has an STI."

But back to you and your hangover and your hopes that you're going to see her again. While this may happen, don't get those hopes up too high. It might break your heart.

Signs that she's not going to call

O woe is me. She is remorseful about what she has done and is panicking about the fact that you may tell someone.

Didn't miss a thing. She made very sure she had all her stuff before she left, so she didn't have to come back again.

Off the hook. There never seems to be any answer at the number she gave you. She doesn't respond to messages.

The breakfast run. She didn't stay for breakfast – she hit the road five minutes after she woke up, mumbling something about a meeting.

See you around. Your suggestion of having coffee at some stage was met with vague indifference.

On the job. Questions about what she does for a living were skillfully evaded – she doesn't want you to contact her at work.

Look the other way. She pretended not to see you when you saw her in the supermarket a week later.

All yours, baby. You phone to tell her she left a brand new sweatshirt in your flat and she tells you to keep it.

Home alone. The lights and the TV in her flat are on, her car's in the road, but she's not answering the door when you buzz her on the intercom.

Wedded bliss. You see her the next month in front of the post office with what has to be her husband. – (Susan Erasmus, Health 24)

Read more:
Is he interested or not?
Any questions? Ask our sexologist

 
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