Read on and find out what your lover, whether about-to-become, present or ex,
really meant when he or she said the following:
| We are just friends |
Try as I might, this person just won't get into bed with me
- yet |
| I worry about your health |
If you think I am going to push you around in a wheelchair
when you've got emphysema, you've got another thing coming |
| I have never faked an orgasm |
If you believe that, you'll believe anything |
| I like you as a friend |
One step closer and I'll punch you on the nose |
| I want you to be successful |
Can you seriously see me living as a pauper until my
inheritance comes through? |
| Of course you aren't fat |
Pick up two more kilo's and I'll hit the road |
| I'm not ready for a relationship |
Not with you anyway, not now or ever |
| I have only had sex with one other person |
I am not counting colleagues or one-night-stands |
| What's mine is yours |
Touch my hi-fi or video recorder and you're dead.
What's more, you don't even know about my shares |
| I'll love you forever |
You are actually the third person I say this to, but you
know how these things go |
| I have to go out of town on business |
Yes, but I am not telling you that the tall, dark and
handsome guy from Accounts is going too. |
| I can't make it tonight - I have family commitments |
An old girlfriend/boyfriend is in town and I am having
dinner at the hotel |
| I need space |
I have met someone else and strangely enough I don't need
space when they are around |
| I love you when you wash the dishes |
This one is true - I will also tell you how much I love you
when you fetch the kids, even though it is my turn. |
| Of course I care about your parents |
If I never have to see them again, it will be too soon |
| I'm not good enough for you - you deserve someone better |
Actually I deserve someone better, now will you stop nagging |
| It's not a problem at all, I understand |
If you ever make me wait half an hour in the boiling sun for
you again, I'll give you up for medical experiments |
| That outfit looks lovely |
You look like Goofy, but we are already half an hour late |
| Of course I want to go shopping with you |
Frankly I would prefer root canal treatment |
| I'm working late, but remember I'm doing it for us |
I was the first one to manage to get a date with the new
marketing manager |
| I'm not going to ask you again to pick up your underwear
from the bathroom floor |
I'll probably have to ask you another twelve thousand times |
| My cellphone was switched off last night, because I went to
bed early |
That part is true, but I was not alone |
| Of course he/she is not as attractive as you are |
I can feel my nose growing longer |
| I love you just the way you are |
Nothing 500 sessions with a shrink and a complete makeover
couldn't solve. |
| Sorry I didn't wait up for you |
I sat in the dark in the sitting room and quickly ran to bed
when I heard you car stopping |
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