02 February 2004

Flirting and your relationship

Is flirting good for a relationship? In a committed relationship should there still be space for it?

Is flirting good for a relationship? In a committed relationship should there still be space for it? You might have no intentions of cheating or anything even remotely close to that. You might be totally in love with your partner.

You might not really be a flirty kind of person. Does being very friendly or kind of flirty make you feel good about yourself? Although it might not “mean” anything, is it fun?Most people flirt now and then and there's not much harm in it, but that doesn't mean one should go so far as to say that it is good for a relationship either.

Recent research studies about why married men pick a BMW over a Volksie has shown that one of the reasons was that if they broke up with their wife, the BMW would be better for getting dates.

So you see, in the back of many men's minds is the possibility that their marriage might not last. By practising flirting, in a sense you are saying the same thing. You don't want to fall out of practice so that if you do break up, you can get right back into action.

By keeping that reserve shows that you are not 100% committed to the relationship. If you're at 99%, that's not bad, but if you keep on practising your flirting skills, it might dip to 98% and then 97%, etc. So while flirting can make you feel good, and it's all right to do it once in a while, try not to make a habit out of it.

And definitely don't keep flirting with the same woman or you'll soon be out of the 90th percentile and into negative numbers before you know it.

Post a question on our sexology forum.

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