Posted by: L | 2011/06/29


Hubby and ADD??

Good evening, I have been married to my husband for 18 years. However he has had some strange habits that have bothered me which I did not notice whilst dating him. I thought perhaps he would outgrow them . They are : Watching tv till early hours of the morning, always going out to visit friends coming home late at night, when at the dinner table or in restaurant, he finds something to play with i.e. chopsticks whilswt waiting food, or when in a large shop i.e. Makro, bounces a ball up and down while we shop, is always on the cellphone with varoius people, keeps talking on his phone whilst driving (not having an affair), thereby practising bad driving skills and endangering our lives, etc. etc. I told him the other day that I think he needs medication, he is always so otherwise engaged, like a small child fascinated with a new toy. It drives me nuts!! Our children are 18, 13, and 9. They notice too. When someone speaks to him, he doesnt seem to understand the full implication of the statement or question and gives a half answer or something not related.
PS he was in the SAPS for 20 years, could it be the stress? He is running his own business now, and I notice when staff or his partners ask stuff, he gives incorrect or not well-thought through respsonses. I get nasty at times and say he needs medication or a brain shock, he just laughs! The kids mock him all the time, yet I think its a seroius matter and he is not aware.

Expert's Reply


ADHD Expert

Dear L,

The difficulty you are likely to face is getting your husband to willingly go for an assessment. There is very little you can do without his cooperation. Getting him to listen and understand your frustrations may help, however, from what you have said, it does appear that he is aware of the mis-information he is passing on. Without him being aware of it, it will be very difficult for him to do anything about it.

It may well be a delayed stress response to his previous work, but again, without his buy in there is nothing you can do about it.

I would suggest trying to explain how his behaviours impact on those around him and see if you can convince him, it sounds as though you have tried but it may need more time.

Please be aware that if it is ADHD, it is not something he can easily control and change. The family's support will be essential.

Good luck,

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Posted by: Mitch | 2011/09/02

Aritcels like this make life so much simpler.

Reply to Mitch

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