ADHD

Question
Posted by: Caroline | 2010-10-26

Q.

ADD/ ADHD

I''m in need of sound advise and help please. I have 3 children spaced over 4 years. They have always been healthy, busy kids. I do not allow them to sit in front of the TV or playstation or Pc games everyday. I block the tv and change codes on them to force them to play outside and swim or run around. they are good in sports and I think, well-balanced kids. Not shy and they can have a proper conversation about anything with adults.
For some people they might be a pain because both me and my husband grew up in big cities and we now stay in a small town where it''s still " oom"  and " tannie" .
This year has been hell for me and my 10 year old boy. His teacher decides he has ADHD and actually told me to put my son on Ritallin. In the second term I gave him some Omega 3& 6 in the mornings to help him in class but was told to take him for tests etc. I took him to our nearby univerity for IQ tests and was told told his non-verbal IQ is superior and he scored full marks in maths and 3 dimensional tests. His verbal IQ is average and that his exam marks is due to what he listens and remembers from in class. That averages about 60% for subjects he likes to 50% for the least interesting subjects. His ECG showed " super-normal"  brain activities and after concultation with the neuro specialist I was told that I should try and move him to the next grade (which is not allowed in our little school in town).
We tried a generic Ritallin for a month but he became very aggressive and had terrible anger outbursts and we stopped it immediately.
He can sit and build his Lego''s for hours or if he plays a game he can concentrate for hours on it. He was the only boy in his class that finished a 126 page English(his very first) book for a book report in his class. If something triggers and facinates him, he can sit still and really concentrate for long periods.
For a grade 4 boy he is suffering from a slight bit of depresion due to him being bullied by his teacher and fellowpupils. If something goes wrong in class, he''s pinned as the culprit and picked on. I can move him to a private school but that is 160km away from home. I''m sel-employed in a little Automotive Engineering business and work myself. He would rather come spend time working on the machines with me and his dad than do homework or go to school.
I used to listen in class when I was in school and in the afternoons rather enjoyed reading storybooks or doing sports than studying. I passed my matric with 3 extinctions without opening a book due to my memory skills I had to learn to cope. Still in my work I need challenges every day otherwise I get bored and when that happens I don''t like my work anymore. I still cannot on 41 cope with boring routines.
Please help me and advice me on what to do to help him. Coping skills to teach him would help me as well because I''m fed-up with teachers thinking they know everything and in the end you as parent have to help your child cope with rejection, bullying, him/her feeling like failures because they feel they are stupid and dumb! This year was the very first time that a teacher " diagnosed"  the problem.

Expert's Reply

A.

ADHD Expert

Dear Caroline,

Firstly, a teacher is in absolutely no position to diagnose a child, formally or informally, and have no place telling a parent to medicate a child. These decisions are intended for medical professionals together with the parents.

Secondly, nobody likes to do boring things, but sometimes we just have to, and children need to learn this as part of growing up. Encouraging your children to be outside rather than in front of the TV is a wonderful achievement and I hope you manage to maintain it.

I hope I haven't misunderstood your post, but moving a child up a grade is not always the best answer: although they may be more intrigued with the subject material, they are not on the same emotional level and this may cause a new set of difficulties. If he is not being challenge enough in class, you can ask the teacher to provide extension work for him when he has completed his class work (this should in no way be used to calculate his year mark).

I do not know the circumstances of the IQ test your son went through, but the person administering the test may not have been trained in ADHD. To confirm or dispel a diagnosis of ADHD please consult ADHASA for a medical professional in your area.

On a positive note, it is almost the end of the year and your son will have a new teacher next year who hopefully will be able to provide the environment your son wants.

There are a number of workshops available (depending on your area) to boost self esteem and build parenting skills (teaching you to teach your child to cope).

I wish you both all the best for next year.
Delia

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

1
user comments

C.

Posted by: ADD/ADHD Expert | 2010-10-29

Dear Caroline,

Firstly, a teacher is in absolutely no position to diagnose a child, formally or informally, and have no place telling a parent to medicate a child. These decisions are intended for medical professionals together with the parents.

Secondly, nobody likes to do boring things, but sometimes we just have to, and children need to learn this as part of growing up. Encouraging your children to be outside rather than in front of the TV is a wonderful achievement and I hope you manage to maintain it.

I hope I haven't misunderstood your post, but moving a child up a grade is not always the best answer: although they may be more intrigued with the subject material, they are not on the same emotional level and this may cause a new set of difficulties. If he is not being challenge enough in class, you can ask the teacher to provide extension work for him when he has completed his class work (this should in no way be used to calculate his year mark).

I do not know the circumstances of the IQ test your son went through, but the person administering the test may not have been trained in ADHD. To confirm or dispel a diagnosis of ADHD please consult ADHASA for a medical professional in your area.

On a positive note, it is almost the end of the year and your son will have a new teacher next year who hopefully will be able to provide the environment your son wants.

There are a number of workshops available (depending on your area) to boost self esteem and build parenting skills (teaching you to teach your child to cope).

I wish you both all the best for next year.
Delia

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