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A guide to great kissing

Knowing when to kiss for the first time:

  • Break the ice by greeting your date with a kiss on the cheek. When it comes to the time for the "real" kiss you will both be much more relaxed.
  • Touch your partner throughout the evening. Don't hold the touch too long, however. Use your judgment.
  • Wait for the moment to present itself.
  • Look for cues from body language. Is your partner moving into you?

Step-by-step:

  • Tilt head, close eyes (enhances the sensation of the kiss)
  • Kiss lightly with soft lips and a slightly open mouth.
  • Savour the smell.
  • Gently move your whole body toward your partner, if he/she is responding, press your chest towards him/her, then your waist and finally move your hips.
  • Feel your partner's rhythm, match it.

Tongue:

  • Gently move the tongue in, exploring the inside of the lips, move in a little more paying attention to your partner's motions and rhythms.
  • Take turns exploring each others' mouths.
  • Play with the tongue.

Kissing do's and don'ts:

  • Don't slobber - The amount of moisture should remain the same as your normal state.
  • Don't tense up your lips - allow your lips to relax, not sloppy, but loose.
  • Do Tease - be gentle at first. Give your partner a chance to come after your lips, want your lips.
  • Use all your senses to make love with your mouth.
  • Be aware of your oral hygiene. Smell and taste can be the most potent of aphrodisiacs (or turn-offs).
  • Don't press your lips too much into your lover's lips. Squashing your lover's lips is not passionate, it just hurts and makes it difficult for them to respond.

Tips to make it special

  • Ear nibbling - lightly little nibbles, alternating with light sucking of the lobe is an effective technique.
  • Cherish the bottom lip. Gently suck the lower lip between your lips for a second before you let it go. Even nibble gently.
  • Use your hands. Hold the face, caress hair, slide your hand down the back. Each one will enhance the kiss that much more.
  • Enhance the senses - Connect your lips and then don't move. A kiss that will build your anticipation for everything else as it builds intimacy.
  • Be creative - Develop you own special kissing style. Don't stick to one thing. Explore, enjoy the senses.
  • Get into it. Your lover will be able to feel your involvement. Enjoy your senses.
  • Allow the tongue to dance together, teasing it, melding with it, moving together, and apart. Let your lover take the lead once in a while. Allow his/her tongue to set the tone, follow it where it goes.
  • Lightly lick the neck, use your soft hot breath to linger over the ear.
  • Move your soft lips down the neck to the very sensitive area where the hairline stops. Lick and nibble.
  • Use chocolate, honey, mint candy or wine to make your lips taste sweet or pass it between you to share the flavour and enhance the senses.

(Susan Erasmus, August 2004, Health24)

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