Posted by: dottygirl | 2009-01-30

Your view please

This is all about love and relationships and I don' t know where else to post my thoughts about this. It about me and this guy.

We can share all our thoughts together but the one thing that bothers me a lot is that he says love makes him absolutely nauseous and the thought of being in love with someone is sickening to him. What does this all mean because he treats me like a girlfriends and neither of us has said how we feel. I dare not say anything because of what he' s told me. What makes me different to other women he has had and called them his girlfriends, yet I am not his girfriend. After nearly a year??? He treats me with so much respect and all that' s in between there is nothing more I could ask for but what makes this different that love is such a bad thing to feel??

He confuses me so much because he will say the most meaningful things and how we have this " connection"  yet love makes him feel sick?? How come? What is the difference?

Does he even know what he' s talking about me or am I only good for one thing. I don' t understand how a person can say such deep things and still say that love is sickening. Why why why???

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Our expert says:
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Obviously, I have no idea what he means --- only he can explain these comments to you. In a pleasant way, ask more about this unusual response, and how he feels about love in general and you in particular. What does HE think this relationship is, and where does He think it is going ? Do i gather that the idea of "love" makes him feel sick, but sex doesn't nauseate him at all ? And as others imply --- is he fearful of LOVe as a feeling . emotion, or of committment ? Sounds ominously like using

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Our users say:
Posted by: Experienced | 2009-01-31

May I advise you on what steps to take ? Large and rapid ones away from him as far away as you can go. This guy is toxic. You are being used by someone who has no respect for you. Lack of respect for a person is in my book is the biggest most unforgivable , personal ,in your face insult I can imagine. At least have some respect for yourself and dump him. There are some great guys out there who would treat you with respect and give you the love you deserve. You just do it girl !!!

Reply to Experienced
Posted by: bonitaj | 2009-01-30

Hi dotty girl!
Sorry to hear of your dilema. Truth be told this guy has serious problems with commitment. He has either been smothered by his mother...or has been trapped in a previous relationship that hurt him deeply and he sounds as if he is still running acared. If he can' t admit to LOVING anyone - not even you - then I hate to say it, but he needs to get help!
THerapy or some othe reality jolt, like your telling him- his behaviour is NOT NORMAL or no longer acceptable.
Call his bluff! Don' t sweat it - loads of fish in the sea!

Reply to bonitaj
Posted by: anon | 2009-01-30

If he wasn' t let down badly in the past then he is afraid to commit....just wants it all and no commitment....don' t push him...wait a while and if he still feels the same then move on with your life....don' t be his door mat....

Reply to anon

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