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Question
Posted by: anonnnnn2 | 2012/08/24

Wife

I meet this lady in Jan 2009 and start dating 2009 october , and we had a bady girl in 2010 November, got married in 2012 August.

1.before the baby was born my mother asked that 3 month after the child is born she needs the child to come visit and perform some rituals, finally the day has come for the child to visit my mother went there to collect the child to my surprise gf father refused iwith the child i confronted him., everytime i go and see the child he would basically chase me away . That why i got married because i wanted access to my child.
The wagen wheel has turn the gf father was admited in hospital on the 20 August 2012 and had no warm clothes, i send him warm clothes yesterday in the evening had to bribe hospital personnel to give him those clothes
,
2.Prior to June 2011 I was a breadwinner from my Family side(home) , paying for my sister vasity fees during that period she would take me out for dinner and afterward tell next time i must pay which i never had a problem with it, but most of my cash was going toward my family. i could only afford mcdonalds by then which she did not like at all,once she told me that if i eat have to contribute toward her grocery. i cant get this thing out of my mind.

3.In 2011 the companys she works for enrolled her for some course in unisa by could not written exam due to medical reason, she had to refund the company , I loan her the money and helped her with money for some basic needs

In 2009 i bought i house and rented for extra cash, now we both live in that house, and i pay for almost every thing. I asked her if i did the things to her or tell me would she be happy .Advise if am being cruel.






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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

If any hospital workers asked for or even just accepted a bribe for ANYTHING whatesoever, let alone giving warm clothes to an old man, report them to the hospital superintendent and to the police - they are criminal and immoral and should not be allowed to work in any hospital.
Its good for someone to help to support their family, but it sounds as though your sister was greedy and unappreciative. People being helped by the goodness and generosity of others should never be greedy or ungrateful. Tell her that, and remind her that if she doesn't like the money yougenerously give her, she is entirely free to stop taking the money. Remind her, too, that a loan is meant to be repaid. Andf if she is working for a company, surtely earnin a salary, why does she expect you to meet so many of her expenses ? If she is taking a part-time educational course, isn't it sponsored by her company ? Is she perhaps getting you to pay her for what someone else is already paying ? Why cant she met her own "basic needs" if she has a job ? Is she wasting any of the money she earns ?
You are not being cruel, but FAR, far too generous. Why is she living for you rent-free and expecting you to pay all the expenses ? What on eaerth does she do with the money she earns ?


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2
Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/08/25

If any hospital workers asked for or even just accepted a bribe for ANYTHING whatesoever, let alone giving warm clothes to an old man, report them to the hospital superintendent and to the police - they are criminal and immoral and should not be allowed to work in any hospital.
Its good for someone to help to support their family, but it sounds as though your sister was greedy and unappreciative. People being helped by the goodness and generosity of others should never be greedy or ungrateful. Tell her that, and remind her that if she doesn't like the money yougenerously give her, she is entirely free to stop taking the money. Remind her, too, that a loan is meant to be repaid. Andf if she is working for a company, surtely earnin a salary, why does she expect you to meet so many of her expenses ? If she is taking a part-time educational course, isn't it sponsored by her company ? Is she perhaps getting you to pay her for what someone else is already paying ? Why cant she met her own "basic needs" if she has a job ? Is she wasting any of the money she earns ?
You are not being cruel, but FAR, far too generous. Why is she living for you rent-free and expecting you to pay all the expenses ? What on eaerth does she do with the money she earns ?


Reply to cybershrink
Posted by: Honesty | 2012/08/24

Bribing hospital workers is not acceptable and taking your wife to MacDonalds is inexcusable. But l do not think you are cruel, just confused!

Reply to Honesty

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