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Question
Posted by: Irritated | 2008/05/28

Why the dresses?

I am ok with gay and lesbian people but WHY do gays always have to pretend they are women, wear dresses and makeup and such? THAT really irritates the sh1t outa me. It makes me cringe.And sometimes I wonder if the backlash you get from the so-called homopbobic community is justified. Sorry to say this but I feel you guys sometimes ask for it.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageGay, lesbian and bisexual expert

Oh dear Irritated, I think you've put your foot in it....

Let's see where this goes.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Vernon'sister | 2008/05/29

Its just that these butch ladies look gross , they even try and walk like men.

Reply to Vernon'sister
Posted by: Neil | 2008/05/28

V'Sister are you even thinking about what you're saying? If some of us can be who we want to be then ALL of us can be who we want to be - men, women, butch, fem..... right?

Reply to Neil
Posted by: Nikkits | 2008/05/28

V'sister,

Oh let go the name calling - it doesnt suit you - you sound like a female trying to argue like a man.

Your lack of knowledge is clearly overwhelming your sense of mature debate (usually when name calling is used to fill the gaps)

Reply to Nikkits
Posted by: Vernon'sister | 2008/05/28

Ja I have to say it, a female trying her damb best to dress and look like a male looks gross.
NumbNuts read my posting I said a female , not some male/female transgendered . Females that dress like males , get it , Butch women.

Reply to Vernon'sister
Posted by: Nikkits | 2008/05/28

V_sister,

clearly you did not read a word I just said.

What makes you think that those "girls" who go to the extreme of wearing male and "trying" to grow a mustache, are in fact LESBIAN?

You happen to get people who are male to female and female to male transgendered and your "gross" happens to be the way they see themselves to be and proud to be in the wrong gender.

Not only are you generalising BUT you are discriminating against people you cannot begin to understand.

What I find more GROSS (in fact worse then gross) are people who JUDGE other people without having any understanding of it.

I think you owe this forum an apology ...........

NIkkits

Reply to Nikkits
Posted by: Vernon'sister | 2008/05/28

I have to agree but more on the lesbian side . Nothing more gross than a female trying to look butch , And dont say I'm generalizing cause there is a lot of them around.
Something like this - Short spikey haircut , mens longs with mens belt , mens watch , mens shoes , longsleeve shirt rolled up sleeves , and then trying to grow a mustache , shyte but that is just gross.

Gay men tend to wear more tight pants , lol think they like advertising their bulge .Yep that too looks gross.

Reply to Vernon'sister
Posted by: Gareth | 2008/05/28

Irritated, how many gay people do you know? If you generalise like this, I assume not many. And as said here above, it is only a very small percentage of gays that will wear dresses or try to be like woman. But that is besides the point. Acceptance means live and let live. Don't let what other people do or how they act irritate you. To each his own. All of us have habits and things that we do that might irritate or confuse other people - like squeezing the toothpaste tube at the front - other people (like me - I have to confess, hehehe) hate it, and squeeze it from the back to the front. But everyone of us is different and do things "our way". That is what makes life interesting.

Reply to Gareth
Posted by: Nikkits | 2008/05/28

Irritated,

I think you are irritated for some other reason and before this post turn into a flaming war LETS GET A FEW THINGS SORTED OUT!

Thanks to the old generations of beliefs, far too many people are under the impression that in a gay relationship one of the partners wants to be a woman.

THAT IS ABSOLUTE NONENSE!!

Homosexual means SAME thus man sexually attracted to another MAN not a man wanting to be a woman.

Yes some people drag and they do it for two reasons

1. To show a sense of "pride" and "acceptence" to what society incorrectly preceives them to "be". It is here where accerted efforts are needed to EDUCATE the general public (and many gay people too) so that this incorrect idea of being gay is removed.

2. They could have Gender Identity issues and because of the lack of proper education on the subject of sexuality (which most of society sadly is subjected to as NO ONE SHOULD APPARENTLY TALK ABOUT SEX (shame)), they think they are gay when in fact their gender issues are a different subject alltogether.

NOW ON A MORE PERSONAL LEVEL (IF YOU DONT MIND) as it irritates me endlessly (LOL)

Just what is your problem with a person who happens to be transgendered and dress or present in the opposite gender of birth. To be honest with you my friend, your attitude (being irrated and NOT having a problem with Gay and Lesbians BUT ..) is an indication the you and I will not see eye to eye and you dont even know what I am about and why.

I would also like to get your reaction if I am to tell you that I am a heterosexual woman born with male genitals (which has been correct with surgery) and not even gay at all!!

I hope this will lead to a discussion where you and a few others may LEARN something for a change

Regards
Nikkits
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Reply to Nikkits
Posted by: Joe | 2008/05/28

Ok, if you want to generalise I can too, why do straight men after they get married become so fat and ugly and not looking after themselves and think they can bed any woman??? I have no problems with straights but it irritates me to see these men walking around everywhere and think they are God's gift to women?????

Reply to Joe
Posted by: Stop right there! | 2008/05/28

Look buddy, let's get one thing clear: Not all gay men like to wear dresses. It's like saying that all straight guys are beer-chugging, rugby-fans, who burp and fart to amuse themselves....

See, that is GENERALIZING. Not all straight guys are pigs, and so not all gay guys jump into dresses and wear make-up. I am myself a out and proud gay man, who has never been in a dress. Not because I have anything against gay guys who like to drag, but I personally don't find it appealing. Also, I don't have the figure for it :). My best friend is a drag artist, but he is not effeminate. He was a rugby player on the high school 1st team, and by 1st glance you would never suspect that he is gay, but he doesn't hide it either.

The thing is, people should start letting other people just be who they want to be. Fortunately, we live in a country where the constitution allows and protects everyone, regardless of ethnicity, sexual orientation, etc.

The only way people will learn to accept and respect each other, is through education, compassion and understanding. If you want to live your life the way you want to, I'll bet that you won't let anyone tell you that it's wrong.

Everyone on earth has a God-given right to live out their lives in a way that makes them happy.

In short, not all gay guys wear dress and make-up. For the guys that do like to wear dresses, leave them alone, it's what they want to do. For those of us who don't wear dresses, we're just like any other guy you know. It's not to say that drag artists are a different "breed" or "species". It just so happens that wearing a dress might help them feel more comfortable with themselves. Whatever the reason, we are all still just people at the end of the day. We should stop pointing out our differences, but start recognizing out similarities.

PS. Didn't mean to sound offensive, but it's the way it is.

Reply to Stop right there!
Posted by: Deeve | 2008/05/28

Probably 0.00000001 % of the Gay community have ever donned a frock, or put on make up, except for a fancy dress party!
Those who like to cross dress, are always in the front line, and therefore you presume that 'most' aspire to this. And anyway, those that do it, do it because 'they can!'
Let me help you right here.....I can assure you that 99.9999% of Guys posting here is as butch as you are, and wouldn't be seen dead in a frock!
The pics you're looking at are probably 'Gay Pride' where the Community go bannana's and 'anything' goes.
Most Mardi Gras are like this, and are not a representation of a whole Community.
Cheers

Reply to Deeve

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