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Question
Posted by: messed up | 2011-07-20

why is this bugging me?

My ex and I parted ways before he went travelling 2 months ago. However he wanted to stay in contact and he told me I must not cut him off. When he was away, I was in contact with him and was even making plans to go and visit him. I wrote him a heart wretching e-mail saying how much I miss him, etc, etc... however he never replied to it.
2 weeks ago, a friend of mine for over 2 years and I decided to get together. I havent spoken to my ex since but I know that he is back in the country since the weekend. He has made no attempt to contact me and I find it strange as he was the one who said we must not cut ties. I have moved on so I dont know why this is bugging me. How I can I just forget him and focus on my new boyfriend?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

This is why people talk about Closure - neither of you have closed this book. However amicable the parting, what's over needs to stop, or neither of you will manage to move on, as you need to do.

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: Li | 2011-07-20

You havent really moved on because there was no closure. He wanted to keep ties (being polite or changed his mind), you kept the ties (emails), he didnt and you dont know why. It''s tough. Years later you will still be wondering why. Contact him and tell him goodbye in a nice way. If not possible, write it all down (all your feelings) on real paper. Edit it after 2 days and just tell him what you really want to " Goodbye"  is good, and burn the other original or tear it up and throw it into the sea.
No guarentees but such is most things in liffe.

Reply to Li
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011-07-20

This is why people talk about Closure - neither of you have closed this book. However amicable the parting, what's over needs to stop, or neither of you will manage to move on, as you need to do.

Reply to cybershrink

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