Posted by: flower | 2008-12-22

why do I feel like this

Good day Doc
I have a problem in my marriage , we have been married for 10yr , my dh has got a foul temper he is like a dynamite waiting to explode and I cant take it anymore we cant drive anywhere then he gets road rage he does not talk to anyone except when he is fighting and swearing at me or the kids we dont know what to do anymore , my youngest son asked me yesterday if I even love daddy ? See doc he only calms down when he gets physical att or when he drinks , now I had enough doc , I just cant get myself to even show him any affection, it is like a mental block in my mind , and it is causing me to drift further and further away from him , it feels like a lot of weight has been lifted now that he has gone to work today , I spoke to him on thurs. we all went for supper , after a couple of drinks he said that he knows he has a temper problem but does not know why , it is not me or the kids , he just does not know ? this is not an excuse ! , the atmosphere is horrible at home when he is around , I am fed up to be the one that can cheer up his mood what does he offer me ?? he takes and takes and takes ! I just cant anymore , I even worked out my finances to see if I can cope by myself , I cant go to another counsellor either , we have been there 3times already , and doc I know that I am not perfect but everytime the paw paw hits the fan it is becuase of his wrong doing ... what can I do ?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

your reaction to his bad moods and anger is entirely understandable and natural. Now, his comments over dinner the other night suggest that he is aware of the problem, is puzzled because he can't understand it, and might, if caught at the right time, be open to seeking help to get it under control. And fortunately one doesn't have to fully understand the origins in order to be able to bring it under control. Can't he be persuaded to see a shrink for assessment, as CBT and medication could bring this under control, and make life happer for him and for all of you >

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