advertisement
Question
Posted by: Joe dunno what to do... | 2010/12/23

WHY CAN''T I SEEM TO GET MORE THAN TWO DATES?

Hi All,

I''m really struggling here. What am I doing wrong? I can''t seem to get more than two or three dates when I go out with a woman...

I''m really not sure what i''m doing wrong. I recently went out on a double date, after the second one, there was no more :( I even asked my friend what I did wrong, and as he so rightly pointed out, nothing...

I always think I say the wrong things or do the wrong things... but i''m not. Is it ''cos of the type of woman that i''m going after? Is it me?

I hardly ever go in for a kiss on the first date. I tend to just take it easy and let the conversation flow. I walk the girl to her car or drop her off at her place, if the moment is right, i''ll go for a kiss, if not, I just leave it till next time. While we are leaving, i''ll usually set up like another date - like say dinner or something like that (that''s more intimate than the first date - which will then hopefully lead to a kiss)...

The next day i''ll text the girl saying I had a great time and will speak to her soon about the next date.

Usually that''s when it ends. If i call again, it goes to voicemail or something like that or we may go out and i''ll get the friend sms after the third date - you know, " I like you, as a friend" ... I have my response down to a T as how to reply to it.

I don''t come across as being desperate, i''ve asked my friends, they''ve confirmed it. It''s just emotionally and financially draining - I pay on the dates.

Am I just a meal ticket or what? I''m doing pretty well for myself, i''m 27, a young professional guy, well educated, I have just bought my own property and drive a nice car - i''ll add that I don''t talk about these things on a date, unless i''m asked. I''ll talk about her life and herself!

What am I doing wrong? Please don''t say it''s the type of girl that i''m meeting. I meet girls in the situations that i''m in - house parties, clubs even online...

So what must I do?

Joe dunno what to do

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

Sorry Joe, I can't possibly give you a well informed decision given that I don't know enough about the situation (ie. has it really been ALWAYS or does it just feel that way?) and furthermore as a sexologist I know a lot about sex and not so much about being an agony aunt...there are many possibilities but your best bet is to just take a deep breath and ask one of the girls for feedback, rather than your friends! Fruthermore, it sounds a little like you are following some kind of 'formula' (e.g. don't speak about yourself, don't push for a kiss on first date, etc) and if this IS the case then you might be being a little robotic....in which case, relax, be yourself (not an image projected by popular men's magazines) and see what comes of that...Whilst the advice and 'formula' is not in itself a bad one, it is if it means that you loose yourself in the process!

Claire - SASHA

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

8
Our users say:
Posted by: me | 2011/01/12

well i must say, if i wasnt in a relationship, you the type of guy that i would want. these day''s most women are after men that just give them sex or money whenever they want. there are many fish in the sea, keep your eyes open, the right one will come.

Reply to me
Posted by: C | 2011/01/07

C''mon Joe - I was just gonna say that you sound like a dream come true and then you post that last comment !!!!!!

Reply to C
Posted by: Joe dunno | 2011/01/07

Yeah, i''m a loser with two degrees on my wall a beach front apartment and a two door coupe!

Ian, you can come check it out on the corner of f**k off and go f**k yourself.

Ian, do you know how to vacuum pack a p***, I don''t either, but take a look at your ID book.

Loser.

Reply to Joe dunno
Posted by: ian | 2011/01/06

just shut the hell up and face it.....you''re a loser!!!!!!

Reply to ian
Posted by: thato | 2010/12/23

eish dude ur just too sweet girls like guys with passion. try to charm by holding their hands.

Reply to thato
Posted by: Lebo | 2010/12/23

and where does one find the type of guy like you? eish...

Reply to Lebo
Posted by: Intruder | 2010/12/23

Joe Joe Joe Joe, you''re being the perfect gentleman for the wrong type of girls, I find that the forward, valgur guyz end up sleep with the girl after three hours and they come back for more, if you lukin for a life partner your lukin in the wrong place if you wanna get laid your in the right place, first date don''t just drop off asked to have some coffee, tea or a drink whatever please you go for the kill make her yours on the first night, ever watch romantic movies ???? Ladies dig that rent one today and see. Thing is you giving the ladies too much time to think it over and doubt makes them not wanna go out with you again...my man go for the kill, you the preditor...Good Luck

Reply to Intruder
Posted by: Sexologist | 2010/12/23

Sorry Joe, I can't possibly give you a well informed decision given that I don't know enough about the situation (ie. has it really been ALWAYS or does it just feel that way?) and furthermore as a sexologist I know a lot about sex and not so much about being an agony aunt...there are many possibilities but your best bet is to just take a deep breath and ask one of the girls for feedback, rather than your friends! Fruthermore, it sounds a little like you are following some kind of 'formula' (e.g. don't speak about yourself, don't push for a kiss on first date, etc) and if this IS the case then you might be being a little robotic....in which case, relax, be yourself (not an image projected by popular men's magazines) and see what comes of that...Whilst the advice and 'formula' is not in itself a bad one, it is if it means that you loose yourself in the process!

Claire - SASHA

Reply to Sexologist

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
advertisement