Posted by: Fav | 2009-11-23

Where to go from here ...

Hi MT people,

I'  m not sure how to "  classify"  this problem I am experiencing at the moment. First of all, I am Biopolar (not really an excuse I think).

I started work for this company in Sept 2006. I just moved back from East London, so I accepted any kind of salary. I was emotionally non-existant, so I accepted which ever came my way ... I can always get better (that'  s what I "  thought"  ).

I was appointed as the CEO'  s PA. About 2 weeks after I started there he started to make advances towards me. When I told him that I feel uneasy about this, he said that I must work closer to him, and that he cannot afford a PA who distantiates (spelling??) herself from him. I was desperate for work, so I grinned and beared it (the way of talk). My watch was broken and he went out to buy me a watch, I had fights with my mom and dad, and he let me stay at home with him and his family, He made me feel special and loved, which I thought I was not "  worthy"  of at that time. Okey, I probably had to stand up for myself, but not everybody is emotionally strong enough.

He insisted that I wear skirts and would then remove my panties and keep it with him for the rest of the day. He will then threaten me by saying that if he feels that I put on another pair of panties he will cut it off with scissors. I was also not allowed to go out for lunch, so I could not even go to PEP to buy a pair.

In November 2006, before our year-end function, he took me to buy clothes. He also helped me to pay the deposit on a flat. He insisted that I take the clothes back to my flat, and that I wear the clothes and show it to him. That day I fell pregnant.

I called him in December 2006 to tell him that I am 5 weeks pregnant. He insisted that I get an abortion. Which I refused. I had a very difficult pregnancy, and my baby was born with abnormalities. I must also mention that I never received flowers or a card from him. All the men whose wifes recently had a baby got bouquets from R300+ and a personal visit.

She died 6 months 13 days later (his own child). Even on that day I did not receive even a card, but the 1 manager'  s father died in December 2008 and alot of effort was done.

He started with the "  panty-feeling"  again in August this year, and even removed it once with the same threat. I have told him that I do not like this. I must also dress sexy, and he wants to see cleavage. I don'  t want this anymore. I'  ve been off work since Wednesday, because I just can'  t face it to go to the office. The other men (all men are managers!!! Never heard of a company with 5 MD'  s, even though they have nobody working under them, total of 14 employees) treats all the women without any respect. According to "  them"  we (women) do not have any brains, except when we have to make coffee or butter rolls for their hamburber braais.

I feel used and abused. I don'  t want to work here any longer. I know that work is scarce.

What do you suggest of a way forward??? Do I quit or try to stay "  alive"  until I find something else??

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I responded the other time this question was posted

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Posted by: cybershrink | 2009-11-23

I responded the other time this question was posted

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