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Question
Posted by: Wonder | 2012/03/13

When to pop the question

Last weekend I met a guy that asked me out. Before we went out I asked him if he is married because I don''''t do married men, I don''''t even see the need to befriend them. His response was "  Ow come on, stop with these questions"  . So I said I won''''t be seeing him. Then he sent me messages saying I have selfishly decided not to see him. I must stop being selfish.

When is the right time to ask if a guy is married? I think upfront is the best time before wasting each other''''s time. I was not being arrogant or trying to act "  holier than thou"  , I just thought it''''s fair to be honest about how I do things.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

That was an evasive answer strongly suggesting that he was, indeed, married. There is nothing selfish, AT ALL, about your deciding not to see him, especially not for that reason. When should you ask if the guy is married ? As soon as he asks you out. No married man should ask you out, no unmarried man should be offended by the question. There's nothing even remotely arrogant or holier than anyone in asking. You are fortunate not to have wated more time on this guy

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5
Our users say:
Posted by: Romany | 2012/03/14

I agree with D.
Married men will only use single women, mostly because they allow them.
Married men will NEVER leave their wives and families for a women, cheap enough to have an affair with a married men.
If you, a single woman, have a thing with a married man, you should know that you are no better than a prostitute. Only thing is, he does not pay you for it.

Reply to Romany
Posted by: D | 2012/03/14

Wish there were more women like you. Big ups to you.

Reply to D
Posted by: Nini | 2012/03/13

there is no right or wrong time to ask that question, however I would suggest right at the beginning would be a good time.

And of course it''s a simple YES or NO question. And if he cannot simply answer either yes or no, then I''m afraid you need to see his reluctance to answer as a ticket outta there.

Reply to Nini
Posted by: Obvious | 2012/03/13

Any man who is interested in you longterm would have no problem in answering your already asked question.
The fact that he will not answer reveals that there will never be a right time to re ask.
Dump him and move on.

l think if you have a full id number you can check anyones marital status on the home affairs web site

Reply to Obvious
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/03/13

That was an evasive answer strongly suggesting that he was, indeed, married. There is nothing selfish, AT ALL, about your deciding not to see him, especially not for that reason. When should you ask if the guy is married ? As soon as he asks you out. No married man should ask you out, no unmarried man should be offended by the question. There's nothing even remotely arrogant or holier than anyone in asking. You are fortunate not to have wated more time on this guy

Reply to cybershrink

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